A little over 24 hours from now, anyone that is currently up to their asses in 1040s will grab the nearest person and try to shameless make out make out with them like it’s V-J Day.
Between now and then however, a client will call some of you DEMANDING that you complete their return that has a dozen K-1’s and a mind-numbing AMT calculation, before the midnight deadline. Oh, and they don’t want to pay any tax.
You, typically being the mild-mannered accountant, just up and lose your shit on this unsuspecting client, who then realizes their tardiness is the cause of this little conundrum, not your lack of a magic wand.
Congrats! You’ve successfully convinced a client that they’ll be filing late, paying a penalty and hereby suck at life. They deserve it anyway, asshats. Feel free to discuss your favorite delivery of last minute bad news to clients and enjoy the next 24 hours, 1040 trolls.
- Top 20 Firm Eide Bailly Gets on the Private Equity Train
- Monday Morning Accounting News Brief: PwC Gave Us a Reason to Mention GTA 6; The Bad KPMG Anecdotes Are Adding Up | 6.22.26
- Friday Footnotes: Deloitte UK Asks Nearly 200 Auditors to Please F Off; AI Chatbots Favored Over Actual Accountants | 6.19.26
The SEC Probably Thought Madoff Victims Would Just Let the Whole Thing Slide
Finally someone has had enough of the SEC’s new-sheriff-in-town act and is suing their asses for missing Bernie Madoff’s not so subtle Ponzi scheme.
Two victims are suing the House of Schape for their money that just up and disappeared, which amounts to $2.4 million. The suit also serves as a friendly reminder for the Commission that they sucked at their jobs big time for the better part of a decade.
According to the suit, the two victims, Phyllis Molchatsky and Steven Schneider, initially tried playing nice by filing administrative claims with the SEC but the Commission told them to get bent, thus allowing Molcahtsky and Schneider to sue in Federal court.
This may result in other Madoff victims filing suit as well, so our advice to M. Schape would be to call over to the Fed and to see if she can borrow that money printing machine.
Two Madoff victims file lawsuit against the SEC [Reuters]
See also: Madoff Victims Devise Hedging Strategy [DB]
E&Y Partners Should Work on Their Ice Breakers Prior to Talking Layoffs
The Pacific Northwest Area leaders have a town hall meeting in the Area offices. The retiring Area Managing Partner and incoming partner both show videos of each other to “introduce” them to the little people. These videos brag about how one collects ferraris (shows other partner in his ferrari at the show room) and the other shows the incoming partner’s closet full of Jimmy Choo shoes. And the best part?? It was at this meeting where they tell people (everyone from admin to partners) that they are making 5% cuts in December…And then of course they proceed to go through multiple rounds of cuts – Dec, March, June and not sure if it is over.
We enjoy an Italian sports car as much as the next guy but for crissakes, using it to segue into layoffs? Do you think they ran this script by anyone or did they just wing it? If you’ve got other stories of tawdry behavior, by all means, pass them along.
The PCAOB Sticks Its Finger in the Fair Value Jar
Editor’s Note: Want more JDA? You can see all of her posts for GC here, her blog here and stalk her on Twitter.
You know that annoying roommate you had in college who always stuck his finger in your peanut butter jar? That’s the PCAOB meddling in fair value and it won’t be pretty.
On October 14 – 15th, the PCAOB’s Standing Advisory Group (SAG) is slated to meet to discuss the particulars of fair value and starts off by admitting that “The Board has no authority to prescribe the form or content of a public company’s financial statements.” OK, so WTF are they doing then?
For the past couple of years, regulators have nudged auditors to get more skeptical when it comes to evaluating fair-value measurements. In the meantime, the controversial accounting rules governing how companies apply fair value have been tweaked and companies’ use of judgment for assigning fair-value price estimates to their financial instruments has grown.
The Public Company Accounting Oversight Board is dipping into contentious waters again by suggesting that new fair-value auditing rules are necessary. The board’s staff has long contended that the use of estimates based on market value — rather than historical cost — adds uncertainty and subjectivity to financial reporting and an added risk of material misstatements. At the same time, the regulator has been slow-footed on previous attempts to change its rules when it comes to auditing fair-value calculations.
So what gives, PCAOB? Don’t you trust that auditors are trained to do their damn jobs?
Apparently not. The PCAOB is concerned that auditors lack the technical skill to evaluate complex financial instruments and frankly I could see why they might be a tad concerned.
Regardless of the applicable accounting requirements, it is a fundamental requirement that the auditor obtain sufficient competent audit evidence to provide reasonable assurance that fair value measurements and disclosures are in conformity with the applicable accounting principles.
The staff believes that a standards-setting project to revise its existing standards on auditing fair value measurements and using the work of a specialist may be appropriate for a number of reasons. Information obtained from the Board’s inspection and enforcement programs indicate that some auditors might not be exercising sufficient professional skepticism when performing audit procedures and evaluating results in higher risk areas of the audit.
Well that’s fabulous. Isn’t it already in an auditor’s job description to approach an audit with professional skepticism and to obtain sufficient audit evidence? So, uh, is the PCAOB implying that auditors have no idea what they are doing? Why doesn’t the PCAOB just do all the audits?
It’s a brave new world, kids, and the PCAOB knows it. Perhaps if regulators had done their job in the first place, auditors wouldn’t be facing increased pressure to somehow decode increasingly complex securitization, off balance sheet entities, and absolutely bizarre financial instruments. But since that’s our reality these days, might as well pop a few Xanax and start ticking and tying your way through those billions in derivatives. Quick, the PCAOB is coming!
Deloitte Is Super Proud of Their 100% Free Preventive Healthcare
A source at Deloitte let us know that at least one partner thought it was pretty kick ass that Uncle Dangle was providing healthcare coverage that basically amounts to an HMO:
I got off a call where a partner seemed pretty pleased w/ himself (read: the partnership). “100% Free Preventative Healthcare” was how it was termed. I’m not sure how it affects others, but frankly under my plan, there wasn’t a difference. Just thought it was funny that a big-deal was made of it when the difference was non-existent.
More, after the jump
Text from Deloittenet:
Deloitte’s Total Rewards team worked with our national medical plans to offer 100 percent coverage of in-network preventive care to all of our program participants as of January 1, 2009. This care applies to well-man, woman, and child visits, including lab tests and other preventive screenings. With such a generous preventive care benefit in place, there is no longer a need for the Physical Exam Reimbursement Policies (Administrative Policy Release 465 for partners, principals and directors and Administrative Policy Release 266 for senior managers and managers).
By using an in-network provider through one of Deloitte’s national medical plans, you are able to receive important preventive health care benefits at no cost. A detailed description of the preventive care benefits available through each of the plans is available on DeloitteNet.
Thanks for the notification D. Save us all the trouble and just call it an HMO. It’s certainly arguable that HMOs have been shown to increase wellness but why the hell didn’t they just claim to have invented the Internet?
(UPDATE 2) KPMG Atlanta Shake-up Makes Us Wonder
Leadership changes are inevitable in any business but the reasons can be a mystery. Dismal performance? Drugs? A pool boy? All of the above??
Tim Flynn (taking a break from his caddying duties) and John Veihmeyer sent a very upbeat email to the Atlanta office yesterday announcing the new office managing partner there.
Atlanta Office Leadership
A Message from Tim Flynn and John Veihmeyer | October 13, 2009
We are pleased to announce the appointment of [redacted] as managing
partner (OMP) for Atlanta, succeeding [redacted] who has moved into a
client facing role reflecting our commitment to focusing our most
experienced Partners directly on the marketplace.
We want to first thank [redacted] for his many contributions to the Atlanta office and for his leadership roles as lead area managing partner and Southeast area managing partner for Audit. In his new role, [redacted] will be focused on developing new market opportunities, serving some of our largest audit clients and assisting national and local leadership with client care and major proposals.
[Redacted] brings more than 27 years of experience to his new role. He is currently the Global Chairman of Industrial Markets and the National Sector Leader for Energy & Natural Resources, based in Houston. [Redacted] has spent the majority of his career serving energy clients, including Duke Energy, Chevron, Schlumberger, and Spectra Energy.
A well-recognized industry speaker and thought leader, [redacted] was a speaker at the 2006 World Economic Forum meeting in São Paulo. He is also a frequent guest on CNBC’s Squawk Box discussing energy issues and is a regular contributor to energy trade magazines. Since 2003, [redacted] has hosted KPMG’s Annual Global Energy Conference, which is attended by 500-600 energy executives each year.
Please join us in wishing both [redacted] and [redacted] success in their new roles, and in thanking [redacted] for his many contributions as leader of the Atlanta office.
Tim Flynn
Chairman
John Veihmeyer
CEO & Deputy Chairman
Ohhhhh, Squawk Box. That’s a feather in your cap.
Our source told us that: “‘Moved into a client facing role’ means you’ve been demoted in KPMG speak.” We asked around and it’s not clear just what the hell that means but we’ll run with it.
If you’ve got some more information on the shake up at the Radio Station Hotlanta, let us know or discuss in the comments.
UPDATE, 2:45 PM: We’ve received some tips confirming a new Dallas managing partner and have also heard there will be some shifting around of leadership in the New York office but we don’t have many details, so please share.
UPDATE, Thursday 2:49: According to another source, Southeast AMPs for the Tax and Advisory Practices are also being transitioned into client-facing roles.
Preliminary Analytics | 10.14.09
• Thanks to everyone that has participated in our survey so far. If you haven’t yet, you can expect Chuck at your cubicle at some point today. Unless you do it now by going here.
• Wall Street On Track To Award Record Pay – “Workers at 23 top investment banks, hedge funds, asset managers and stock and commodities exchanges can expect to earn even more than they did the peak year of 2007, according to an analysis of securities filings for the first half of 2009 and revenue estimates through year-end by The Wall Street Journal.” – Tooo long. [WSJ]
• Geithner Aides Reaped Millions Working for Banks, Hedge Funds – This is nice. It’s been for too long since we had some good wholesome populist outrage. [Bloomberg]
• Bernie Madoff Breaks His Prison Fight Cherry – Apparently someone said “Dow 3,000” and Bern just flipped. See also DB. [JDA]
• Bloomberg Wins Bidding For BusinessWeek – For $5 mil. Estimates were that it was worth $1 bil back in 2000. Ouch. [BW]
Review Comments | 10.13.09
• Don’t forget to take our survey. Again, it’s harmless.
• Heller Creditors to Go After Partners and Accountants? – One more lawsuit won’t hurt, E&Y. [AM Law Daily]
• IRS: Infant Formula Not Deductible by Mother With Double Mastectomy – Oh, that’s nice. [TaxProf Blog]
• High Court To Hear Ex-Enron CEO’s Criminal Appeal – Too bad Ken Lay kicked the bucket. He’s missing the SCOTUS and possibly Broadway. [AP via NPR]
• Judge in Bear Stearns trial rejects jurors for bias – Nice way to start things. [Reuters]
• Senate Finance Panel Approves Health Bill, 14-9 – God, if only this was the end of it. [WSJ]
Thanks to This Week’s Advertiser
A quick word of thanks to this week’s advertiser on Going Concern:
• Verizon Wireless
If you’re interested in advertising on Going Concern, email us at advertising@breakingmedia.com. Thanks!
Firm Mascot Challenge: PwC
We’ll assume everybody is down with the KPMG Pomeranian and Uncle Dangle for Deloitte. If not, speak now or shut your pieholes.
There’s some resistance to the idea of famous Governor banger, Ashley Dupre, being worthy of the PwC Mascot.
Frankly, since P. Dubs has made some feel like prosties already and has also shown that, as firm, they don’t mind whoring themselves out for some scratch, the argument can easily be made that Ashley is the perfect mascot. On the other hand, the point has been made, and is duly noted, that high-priced call girls are much cooler than any accounting firm.
So you see the problem here but it’s not our decision. We’ll leave it up to you. State your submission for the PwC mascot and give a brief explanation for said suggestion in the comments.
Keep it clever people, mascots already assigned to any other team or organization will be ignored with extreme prejudice. On with it then.
Ernst & Young Has Another Vote Counting Gig
WAY more prestigious than the Emmys mind you. No, E&Y has now managed to snag the coveted honor of counting the votes for the inaugural NASCAR Hall of Fame class.
The other firms are, no doubt, insanely envious of E&Y for landing this prestigious gig but we have several important questions:
• Will the E&Y auditors have to memorize the winners and all of their sponsors?
• Shirts (let alone tuxedos) seem a little formal for a NASCAR event so what will the auditors wear?
• Instead of simply handcuffing the results to their wrists, will the auditors need guards armed with Desert Eagles to keep the crazies from highjacking the results?
• Instead of Dr. Horrible, who will make a special appearance to distract the audience during the explanation of the vote tabulation? Jeff Foxworthy seems too obvious.
• Will E&Y be paid in Bud Light as it seems to be accepted as legal tender in these circles?
Let us know your thoughts on E&Y’s new engagement and your ideas on responses to the questions posed above.
Hall of Fame Announcement Set For Wednesday [FanZone Sports]
Let’s Try and Forget About Money
We realize that might sound like kooky-talk but we said try you twerps.
Ajilon Professional Staffing released its salary guide for 2010 and is predicting a decrease in salaries of 0.85% overall. CFOs and Treasurers are expected to take the biggest hit with an expected drop of 7.7%.
Now before you all start belly-aching about less money, the report does indicate that because of regulatory and compliance changes the scope of positions for those with backgrounds in accounting and finance will broaden.
More survey results after the jump
Additional findings:
• The majority of accountants (86%) believe that the convergence from U.S. GAAP to International Finance Reporting Standards (IFRS) will have a positive impact on the finance/accounting profession.
• The demand for financial analysis, budgeting and forecasting due to the recession will be the #1 driver of job opportunities for accounting professionals, followed by the transition to IFRS and the economic stimulus package.
• No surprise, nearly 60% of accountants say they have been spending more time on cost-cutting initiatives as a result of the recession and financial crisis. Some of the things they have been doing to reduce expenses include: cutting discretionary spending; taking a harder look at business lines, product and sourcing; and increasing attention to driving reported earnings and cash flow.
• Fifty-one percent (51%) of accountants said they have imposed across-the-board spending and capital freezes as a result of the recession.
So the last two bullets probably are of most interest because, you know, some of you are intimately familiar with them.
Nevermind that though, it’s in the past. IFRS, even if it’s a DeLorean ride away and government overhaul fever will create jobs for you and you’ll all be back in your McMansions in no time. At least attempt to channel some of that Tony Robbins shit.
Or continue being bitter, whichever.
Ajilon Professional Staffing releases 2010 Salary Guide [Press Release]
