Going Concern

CFOs

Making CFO/Partner: A Guide

Caleb Newquist
July 24, 2009

CFO.com has an article on “What to Do on the Way to CFO“. This encouraged us to come up with our own suggestions but we thought we’d expand our list to include you public accountants as well, so here’s a short list of our key suggestions on “What to Do on the Way to Making CFO/Partner”:
• Develop a personality disorder – Whether it’s OCD, schizophrenia, or histrionic personality disorder, few bean counters make it to the highest levels without a screw coming loose.
• Master the art of small talk – As a CFO or Partner you will likely have to engage with several “little people” in your organization that you are unacquainted with. Small talk is essential to avoid awkwardness in these interactions. Weather, weekend plans, sports are standard topics that will help you avoid the dreaded silence.
Maybe the most important thing is after the jump

&bull Get really passionate about accounting and finance Remember those Grant Thornton commercials that used to run on CNBC? That’s exactly the kind of passion that we’re talking about. If you find it difficult to talk to your spouse, friends, children, and especially co-workers about anything other than financing options for acquisition, key shortcuts in Excel, or how the general public doesn’t seem to appreciate the proposed changes to fair value accounting, then you probably don’t have what it takes to be a partner or CFO.
We realize that this is not an all-inclusive list and welcome your input on what other traits and skills are imperative to achieving the lofty and glamarous heights of a partner or CFO.

IRS Doesn’t Care for Kirk Herbstreit Burning Down His Own House

Caleb Newquist
July 24, 2009

Kirk Herbstreit.jpg ABC/ESPN college football commentator and former Ohio St. QB, Kirk Herbstreit and his wife donated their house to to the local fire department back in 2004 and the Herbstreits took a $330,000 deduction on their tax return.
In an extremely convenient coincidence, the IRS, for the first time, challenged the practice of donating individuals’ homes for such purposes the same year.
The Herbstreits were audited and paid back taxes and interest of $134,606 but are now suing the IRS to get that money back.
Apparently this is a matter of debate amongst tax wonks out there, some saying the donation is kosh and some saying it isn’t. You Michigan fans obviously hope Herbie gets stuck paying the extra scratch but the real question is whether Lee Corso is getting to the age where he’s burning down houses just because he’s totally gone senile.
Herbstreit ‘fire’ puts focus on IRS dispute [Columbus Dispatch via TaxProf Blog]

Uncategorized

Have You Any Tchotchkes?

Caleb Newquist
July 24, 2009

In the spirit of Lehman Brothers’ desperation, we’re looking to find out which firm out there has the best chance of financing its next big settlement by virtue of hocking its tchotchkes on eBay.
Because no one can say with absolute certainty which big firm will be the next be rendered extinct (although there are some wagers on it) and thus, none of you working for any firm can be sure when all that schwag you’re accumulating in your cube farm will be worth anything, we thought we would get your submissions so that we can determine which firm has as shot at using auctions in cyberspace as opposed to closing up shop. At first glance, E&Y has nothing on eBay but books, so we’re guessing you guys have the most to prove here.
Check out another schwagtastic example after the jump

Some of you have probably checked out for the day already anyway, so you might as well start putting that camera phone to use and email your submissions to tips@goingconcern.com. Big firms, small firms, we don’t care, we know there are some real finds out there. Just like this beauty:
rubic's.jpg
The best submissions will be posted here and the respective firm’s ability to spend money on frivolous junk will be duly ridiculed.

Uncategorized

Audit Opinions May Soon Require Partners’ Names Signed in Blood

Caleb Newquist
July 24, 2009

The details are still being worked out but another idea being floated around is giving partners the option of signing some opinions in dog feces, when the opinion being signed is in fact, of equivalent value.
Press Release [PCAOB.org]

Big 4

PwC’s New Investigation Will Invite Terrible Bovine Jokes

Caleb Newquist
July 24, 2009

PwC has investigators all up in their grills again as another audit is going to be subject to an investigation. This time a sub-prime lender in the UK, Cattles.
Cattles is blaming the whole shitshow on a “breakdown in internal controls”, which has been the standard PR sound bite since before Enron.

The Accountancy and Actuarial Discipline Board (AADB), which regulates the profession, announced the inquiry on Thursday.The board, part of the Financial Reporting Council, said it would examine the conduct of PwC and its individual auditors concerning the preparation of financial statements of Cattles and Welcome Financial Services, its subsidiary, for the year ended December 31 2007 and for the six months ended June 30 2008.

According to one analyst referenced in FT Alphaville, Cattles was letting loans go 240 days delinquent before taking any impairment charges. Apparently PwC was okay with that practice.
And since the AADB is going to be looking at “individual auditor conduct”, what are they going to discover? Besides the partner and manager’s daily fat-cat lunches, obv. We invite your thoughts.
We’ve also got the feeling that this might be the type of engagement where you could include a high-def photo of the manager dry-humping the partner’s leg (wearing a leash and spiked collar, natch) as part of the audit workpapers and it would get signed off on anyway. But, like we said, it’s just a feeling.
UK watchdog opens probe into PwC audit of Cattles [Reuters]
Regulator probes PwC over Cattles audit [FT.com]

Scoping

Scoping | 07.24.09

Caleb Newquist
July 24, 2009

BuffettCarriesLunch.standard.jpg • Warren Buffett to Teach Kids About Finance in New Web Cartoon [Bloomberg]
• U.K. GDP Shrinks More Than Expected – “Hopes that the U.K. economy was on the road to recovery after a severe recession received a major blow Friday with official data showing output contracted far more than expected in the second quarter.” [WSJ]
• After Buffett Rebuff, CIT Eyes a Breakup – “Conglomerates Berkshire Hathaway Inc. and Leucadia National Corp. made a bid to buy parts of CIT Group Inc. but were rebuffed by CIT, according to people familiar with the matter, because the price was too low.” [WSJ]
• The Man Who Sank New Jersey [Forbes]

Review Comments

Review Comments | 07.23.09

Caleb Newquist
July 24, 2009

• Council fired Scott Janke after learning of marriage to porn star Anabela Mota aka Jazella Moore – Last we checked, this was still America and bagging a porn star is in the Declaration of Independence or something [NYDN]
• Dozens Arrested in New Jersey Corruption Probe – “Federal agents swept into New Jersey towns across several counties Thursday morning, charging 44 people, including three mayors and religious leaders, in a federal investigation into public corruption and money laundering.” [WSJ]
• Wall Street Journal Coverage Of Crisis Finally Gets Serious – Cankles. Page one. Yes. [DealBreaker]
• Microsoft revenue misses, shares tumble – In other news, Bill Gates is still rich. [Reuters]

CPA Exam

Dear Becker,

Caleb Newquist
July 24, 2009

A reader was kind enough to share with us a letter they sent to Becker after the software expired and was rendered utterly useless.
Here’s an excerpt:
“The Becker lectures sang to me like a siren’s song. Much like poor Odysseus, I screamed for more. Yet, unlike Odysseus, there was no one there to keep me safe. Tim Gearty became the man that I yearned to be. He is smart, funny, humorous, debonair, more dashing than James Bond and full of more knowledge than Ken Jennings. His style rivals that of GQ’s Man of the Month.”
Check out more love for Tim Gearty and Peter Olinto in the whole letter, after the jump

Becker.doc

Don’t Worry, the IRS isn’t Getting Too Soft

Caleb Newquist
July 24, 2009

In 2004, Congress wanted to lay the smackdown on individuals and entities using tax shelters. In order to scare the beejesus out those thinking about the practice, Congress enacted penalties of $100,000 for individuals and $200,000 for entities per non-disclosure to the IRS.
Problem is, Congress, who often pulls out the jump to conclusions mat, didn’t give the IRS any discretion on enforcement so Mom & Pop (who often don’t have kids) shops were getting hammered with fines they couldn’t pay:

In one case cited by the Small Business Council of America, a husband and wife followed the advice of a consultant and set up a limited liability company and Roth individual retirement accounts. When the IRS challenged the way the transactions were done and found income tax deficiencies of $6,812, it was required to impose a penalty of $1.2 million.

The IRS figured that maybe, just maybe, this wasn’t really working the way it was intended and has suspended the collection of fines in order to make the penalties more proportional. Not to worry though, the IRS hasn’t decided whether or not apply the changes retroactively and are only suspending the fines until September 30. They wouldn’t want to tarnish their image as faceless cold-blooded bureaucrats.
IRS Halts Fine Linked To Tax Shelters [WSJ]

CPA Exam

We’re Here to Listen to Your CPA Exam Stories Because We’re Solid Like That

Caleb Newquist
July 24, 2009

Okay, so the purpose of the Elijah Watt Sells post was not to make any of you feel like you’re lesser accountants. We just figured that a good portion of you were hung over today and the story of 10 individuals that got vomit-worthy scores on the CPA exam would get you past the nausea and running to the bathroom to lose that 3 am breakfast.
Now that you’re feeling better, we want to appeal to the rest of you. We want your CPA exam horror stories. Not because we want you to send you running back into the bathroom to sob in the stall. Not because some people we know passed all four sections in one sitting and don’t have any good stories. No, no. We want your stories because we here to listen to you. Besides, they’re probably funny now anyway. Aren’t they? Even if you’re still mortified or pissed off, this your opportunity to vent about it.
Sooooo, did you run out of gas on the way to the exam site? Did your computer crash with 10 minutes to go and you had to re-take the entire exam? We’re you caught cheating?!? Or watching porn? Impress us…

Uncategorized

What’s the Move When You Get Fired for Looking at Porn?

Caleb Newquist
July 23, 2009

Okay number-crunchers, we realize you don’t have the most exciting jobs in the world and sometimes you need a little distraction from Excel. Totally natch. Checking out ESPN, Perez Hilton, Going Concern, Facebook is even encouraged in some circles.
Some of you might even be so bold to see what the latest uploads on YouPorn, XTube, et al. are. Fine. We get that. It’s just your biology running wild right? We totally understand. What we can’t understand is those of you that are blatantly watching two girls, one guy, and a Clydesdale reenact the Kama Sutra in your cubicle.
Of course, when somebody catches you drooling on your keyboard, you have to act completely dumbfounded about how such a graphic display of human and equine love could have ended up on your screen. Somehow your superiors don’t buy your stammered out explanation and you’re out on your ass. Time to find to new job that’s not so uptight anyway, right?
So when you’re sitting in the interview with the potential new boss and he/she asks you why you left your last job, how do you explain your penchant for bestiality in a way that gets you hired? The Journal seems to think honesty is the best policy. Just admit what you did and swear that you’ll never, never, never do it again. We’re not convinced this would go over well but whatevs.
Anyone been fired for “inappropriate” Internet use? Did you cover it up in your next interview with “management and I had differences”? Or did you do your damnedest to find a workplace with a less stringent web use policy? Discuss.
Getting Fired for Inappropriate Web Use [WSJ]