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A Special Holiday Open Items, With a Few Items Of Our Own

As you've gathered by now, I'm far more "hands on" than Colin ever could be, maybe because I never learned to respect others' personal space and he's just, well, anti-social. In the spirit of my need to constantly check in with all of you because I care, before we get into this special holiday edition of Open Items (if you haven't gathered yet, we're getting the heck out of here early today and will not return until Monday), I have a few items of my own to put out there.

First: I am working on a list of the "worst" items you auditors have had to count at year-end. Fittingly, I plan to post this — wait for it — near year-end. So there is still time for you to weigh in. So far, I've determined that just about everyone knows someone who knows someone who had to count animal semen so I'm counting that one as an auditor urban legend unless someone gives me some real documentation/proof otherwise (although I'm sure I will regret asking for it). Jump into the conversation on Reddit or Facebook, and for the shy folk, you can always email in your inventory nightmares anonymously through the tip box.

Second: There was some hostility in the comments this week and by hostility I mean immature dick measuring contests. I remind you all that A) this is the Internet and B) this is the accounting section of the Internet so put it back into your pants and please take that elsewhere. Personal attacks are not only lame but uncalled for. Remember when you guys are complaining about our lack of a forum this right here is why we can't have nice things. Until I have time to draft an official comment policy for GC (and yes, it's coming), know that mommy doesn't have time to babysit children who are supposed to be professional adults. We should all have a good time here but let's watch it with the personal attacks, this isn't Yahoo.

Lastly, things are still a little crazy around here what with me trying to fire Colin the second he promoted me and all that comes with that reorganization, plus the holiday and none of you embezzling millions from clients but I'll say one more time: my door is always open.

Going into this holiday, obviously don't expect to hear much from us but if you need to dodge awkward interactions with your family and the like, know we are always with you in spirit. And possibly on Twitter.

Now, go ahead and get busy in the comments and feel free to air your concerns and worries — no matter how small — and any questions you may have for your fellow capital market servants. Happy Thanksgiving!