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Apparently Shouting “Promote Me! Promote Me!” in a Partner’s Face Can Get You Promoted at Deloitte

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Happy Birthday to Us! Going Concern Enters the Terrible Twos

Yes, today happens to be the blogoversary/birthday/whatever of this here fine publication. Back on this date in 2009, I woke up unusually late on a Monday only to discover that the site was live. I somehow was able to pull myself together and bang out a few posts sans pants without anyone – including David Lat – noticing that I was officially late for my first day of work (not the first time) day since then we’ve managed to come up with enough content to distract/keep you occupied throughout the week.

What have we learned in the past year? Let’s take a quick look back.

Well, for starters an email at PwC Ireland got a little out of hand. Adrienne’s lack of a CPA has come up a few times. Ernst & Young got sued over that Lehman Brothers thing. KPMG got sued for being a boys club. Lots of partners at Deloitte are unhappy. We learned that Rothstein Kass is officially the coolest accounting firm. BDO pays snitches in caffeinated beverages. And we gave lots and lots and lots of career advice. (Jesus, that Dear Abby must have wanted to keel over.) There was also de-pantsing by an accounting professor and now an accounting student. That doesn’t cover everything, obviously – Grover Norquist and Susan Coffey obsessions, Adrienne tells EVERYONE what they’re doing wrong on Twitter, DWB’s scotch-fueled advice, etc.

UPDATE:
I shamefully forgot this:

It’s all been pretty fun and we have you, dear readers, to thank. We really appreciate every single one of you. Especially you, John Veihmeyer. If you don’t email us, Tweet us, FB us, we don’t hear about these funny, disturbing and sometimes pathetic stories. KEEP IT UP. Thanks again for your support!

But now that we’re 2, where do we go from here? We’ve already managed to go from crawling to toddling, learned a bunch of naughty words (okay, we knew those) and quit drooling on ourselves. Basically, as Grover is fond of saying, ONWARD!

Comp Watch ’11: Someone at Ernst & Young Wasn’t Too Discreet with Sensitive Info on Their Commute

From the mailbag:

Happened to be sitting behind someone on my NYC commute this week who was reading a deck (in font large enough for me to read) on EY’s salary ranges etc. Didn’t see any $ numbers and most was hard to see without context or the full page but I did see this:

(I don’t know ey terms – apr = annual performance rating?)

APR 3 4 5
S. Mgr 1% 2% 3%
Mgr 2% 3% 4%

Our tipster stated that the percentages were supposed to represent “minimum raise.” Hard what to make of this as rumors have been all over the board from “They told us not to have very high expectations,” to ” Per my discussions with an Office Managing Partner and a National Practice Leader …. raises should be close to (if not the same) as prior year.” But considering there’s an expensive legal battle on the horizon, maybe this isn’t so crazy? Discuss.

(UPDATE) Ernst & Young Auditor Area Man Takes His Crush for Co-worker Ernst & Young Auditor to Craigslist Missed Connections

Don’t you just love missed connections? Maybe you’re more of a casual encounters person but there’s something to be said for someone that is experiencing such infatuation that dropping a post on Craiglist seems like the best thing to do. Of course, it’s another thing entirely when you are infatuated with someone at work and you conclude that your best way to tell them that they are the most beautiful creature on Earth is by posting on missed connections. Apparently, UPDATE: some dude crushing on an Ernst & Young auditor did just that.

Dating Fails: Dating, Breakup, Boyfriend, Girlfriend - Office Romances Don't Count Online, Right?
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Okay, a few notes:

1. For a lot of reasons, personal and professional, there’s no way I can say anything to you. – What exactly are the “personal” reasons? You can’t speak in coherent sentences? You have awful body odor? You’re actually a serial killer? As for “professional” reasons, we all know that auditors are banging auditors all over the place (SEE UPDATE BELOW), so if you’re simply saying that this can’t happen because it’s against your professional morals then fine but other people around you are getting busy and you will not.

2. I can’t believe you don’t hear that all the time. You probably do. – You’re right. She probably does hear it all the time. But not from anonymous people on the Internet.

3. I wish I could tell you and not come across as a sleaze! – You’re not “coming across,” broski. You’re already there.

This was posted in NYC (expired now) so maybe we can track this guy down and help him with his game.

UPDATE:
After reader input and discussing it with my partner in crime, it’s clear that this is a client leering at the E&Y auditor and AG and others are postulating that our Craiglist creeper is either married or in a committed relationship. If this is the “personal reasons” he spoke of, it’s far less interesting and funny than some kind of social anxiety disorder that renders him a stuttering love-sick fool. But it does begs several societal questions among them: 1) does posting a missed connection constitute cheating? or 2) do we applaud his self-control (until he gets home of course). Discuss.

Cut, Cap and Balance Is Just More of the Same Glut, Crap and B&#$^*!

The plan approved by the House last night traded $2.4 trillion for both the Senate and House approving a balanced budget amendment, though I’m not quite sure how borrowing more money is going to help us get our financial house in order.

If I were a legislator, I’d suggest avoiding the “Let’s pay the Visa off with the Mastercard” tactic if at all possible but that’s just me.

David Brooks broke down the Republican theatrics into four categories: “Beltway Bandits,” the “Big Government Blowhards,” the “Show Horses,” and the “Permanent Campaigners.” FYI for Caleb’s knowledge, Grover Norquist was the one named as a Beltway Bandit, though in fairness to this town, anyone could be considered that.

“The Democratic offers were slippery, and President Obama didn’t put them in writing. But John Boehner, the House speaker, thought they were serious. The liberal activists thought they were alarmingly serious. I can tell you from my reporting that White House officials took them seriously,” Brooks wrote in the NYT.

“House Republicans are the only ones to put forward and pass a real plan that will create a better environment for private-sector job growth by stopping Washington from spending money it doesn’t have and preventing tax hikes on families and small businesses,” said John Boehner in a statement.

Really? So how is it that this includes an increase in the debt ceiling?

Meanwhile, this is what Ron Paul had to say in a statement:

I have never voted to raise the federal debt limit, and I have no doubt that we face financial collapse and ruin if we continue to grow our debt. We need to make major spending cuts now, in this budget, and we can no longer afford to allow more deficit spending based on promises of future cuts.

“The CCB act would add $2.4 trillion of new debt to our gargantuan $14.4 trillion debt. CCB would also only cut $111 billion from this year’s budget, allowing a deficit of nearly $1.5 trillion. This is far from the Pledge’s call for ‘substantial’ cuts. And, CCB locks us into current levels of overseas welfare, which will continue to endanger America’s security by forcing us to subsidize other wealthy nations.

See, that’s pretty much where I’m at with this. The debt trap is impossible to get out of, anyone who has gotten trapped in a pay day loan can tell you all about that.

That’s exactly where we are. That’s where we’ve been. And where we’ll continue to be unless we get the debt monkey off our back. I’m not as concerned about subsidizing China’s explosive growth as I am about compromising our national security by letting those assholes at the Fed run the show. We owe them more than we owe China.

So Norquist may be a tax troll and I’m fine with that but this Dog and Pony Debt Show has got to stop, it’s old and it’s not doing us any good.

Anyone got a better plan?

Accounting News Roundup: IRS Denies Tax-Exempt Status for Political Groups; Ernst & Young’s Disabilities at News Corp.; Apple’s Big Bank Balance | 07.20.11

Obama Backs Latest Bargain [WSJ]
President Barack Obama, in a last-ditch bid for a bipartisan “grand bargain” on the budget, threw his weight Tuesday behind a $3.7 trillion deficit-reduction plan unveiled by six Republican and Democratic senators. The plan, which would span a decade, has scant chance of passing intact as the solution to the current debate over raising the government’s borrowing limit. Some Republicans were wary of the plan’s changes in tax rules. Democrats said it would be near impossible to draft legislative language and pass it quickly.

Political Advocacy Groups Denied Tax-Exempt StatusNYT]
Copies of the letters informing the groups of the decisions were heavily redacted by the I.R.S. when it released them last week, so it was impossible to know the names of the organizations involved, or which political party they might have worked with. “You are not operated primarily to promote social welfare because your activities are primarily for the benefit of a political party and a private group of individuals, rather than the community as a whole,” the I.R.S. wrote in the letters. “Accordingly, you do not qualify for exemption.”

Minnesota lawmakers approve budget deal; governor’s signature will end 20-day state shutdown [WaPo]
Minnesota’s state government is poised to re-open for business after lawmakers worked through the night and agreed on a budget plan early Wednesday to end a nearly three-week shutdown. The last votes came around 3:30 a.m. during a special session that begun Tuesday afternoon, and Democratic Gov. Mark Dayton was expected to sign it later in the morning. His signature will formalize an agreement he reached with key Republican legislative leaders last week and likely mean that most of the idled 22,000 state workers could be back to work by Thursday.

‘Going Concern’ Concerns Fall Again: Report [CFOJ]
The report by Audit Analytics found that the number of audits that included a “going concern” warning declined in 2010 for the second year in a row. Auditors are required to include this warning when they have doubts about a company’s ability to stay in business for another 12 months. The study found that the number of going concern qualifications fell to 2,636 last year from 2,994 in 2009. The number peaked at 3,179 in 2008, with the onset of the financial crisis. Audit Analytics started studying the issue in 2000.

Ernst & Young Deaf, Dumb, And Blind About News Corp. [Forbes]
Hear none. Speak none. See none.

Paying taxes your employer keeps [Reuters]
[I]n Illinois the state income taxes withheld from your paycheck may be kept by your employer under a law that took effect in May. Continental Corporation (CONG.DE), the big German tire maker; Motorola Mobility (MMI.N), the cell phone maker; and Navistar (NAV.N), the maker of diesel trucks for industry and the military, are in on the deal. State officials say a fourth company is negotiating a similar arrangement. Chrysler and Mitsubishi arranged deals with the state in the depths of the Great Recession in 2009; Ford got one in 2007, since revised to let it keep half of its Illinois workers’ state income taxes.

Apple’s Cash Hoard Tops $76 Billion [CFOJ]
Apple’s cash stockpile is growing again, up about $10.4 billion in the last quarter to a whopping $76.2 billion at the end of June, said Peter Oppenheimer, CFO of the iPhone and iPad maker on its earnings call Tuesday. Oppenheimer said he was “thrilled to report the highest quarterly revenue and earnings in Apple’s history.” Oppenheimer was in fine fettle; in response to a question from Wedge Partners analyst Brian Blair about the company’s ability to fend off competitors, Oppenheimer responded in his understated manner that, “we are certainly very, very good with the Internet, with telecommunications and delivering content. I think we have proven that for a decade.”

Murdoch foam protester charged with public order offence [Independent]
Jonathan May-Bowles, 26, of Edinburgh Gardens, Windsor, was bailed to appear before City of Westminster Magistrates Court next Friday, July 29. He is charged with behaviour causing harassment, alarm or distress in a public place under Section 5 of the Public Order Act, Scotland Yard said.

Romney as Job Creator Clashes with Bain Record of Job Cuts [Bloomberg]
“You’d have a president who has spent his life in business — small business, big business — and who knows something about how jobs are created and how we compete around the world,” he said at a campaign stop last month at Buddy Brew Coffee in Tampa, Florida.
What Romney skips is his experience in eliminating jobs. It’s a facet of his career that presents a particular challenge for the Republican primary frontrunner: Tough business decisions don’t necessarily translate into good politics.

Promotion Watch ’11: Grant Thornton Admits 26 New Partners and Principals

Apparently everyone’s email at the Purple Rose of Chicago is broken because I had to learn about this from a press release.

Grant Thornton LLP, the U.S. member firm of Grant Thornton International Ltd, one of the six global audit, tax and advisory organizations, admitted 26 new partners and principals to the firm, effective August 1. These partners and principals are based throughout the firm’s offices across the country.

Partners and principals admitted to the firm are thought leaders upon whom the firm relies to provide personalized attention in serving clients. These professionals have demonstrated consistently their extraordinary ability to understand and meet the needs of client companies and industries. They have also demonstrated long-term leadership in the accounting profession and the community.

“These professionals have demonstrated extraordinary client service, driving value for the dynamic firms we serve,” said Stephen Chipman, Grant Thornton’s CEO. “These leaders exemplify Grant Thornton’s mission of making a difference – to our colleagues, our clients, our profession and our communities.”

It’s also strange that no one from GT has dropped any news regarding compensation discussions as this is about the time we should start hearing it or sayeth comments from the last post on the subject. Anyway, give the new partners a slap on the back or at least a nice note.

Let’s Meet the News Corp. Audit Committee

By now you’ve probably heard that Rupert and James Murdoch had a little Q&A with some Members of Parliament in London today. You may have also heard that things got a little interesting when a man opted to put a cream (origin unknown) pie in the elder Murdoch’s face only to have his wife, Wendi Deng, get a little medieval on the Three Stooges impersonator.

Before all the excitement, things were getting a little awkward, as Rupes came off as very unprepared and on at least one occasion, was slapping the table not unlike your own octogenarian grandfather wanting to know if someone could pass the goddamn mashed potatoes. At one point, the questioning turned to legal settlements and MP Therese Coffey asked the Murdochs if they knew “how much has been paid out in legal settlements.”

James Murdoch [said] he [did] not know total number but said its customary to try to reach out-of-court settlements in many cases. Rupert Murdoch points out News Corporation had a strong audit committee to review all these things.

Right! The audit committee, that’s who you want to talk to. Of course, that’s a pretty lame answer, as Dennis Howlett noted:

Who, exactly, are these capable audit committee members? Here’s the crew from the company’s most recent proxy:

Sir Roderick I. Eddington, Chairman – currently the non-executive chairman for Australia and New Zealand of J.P Morgan. Also former CEO of British Airways. Director since 1999.

Peter L. Barnes – Chairman of Ansell Limited. Director since 2004.

Andrew S.B. Knight – Chairman of J. Rothschild Capital Management Limited. Was also the Chairman of News International (James Murdoch’s current position) from 1990 to 1995. Director since 1991.

Thomas J. Perkins – Partner of Kleiner Perkins Caufield & Byers, a venture capital company. Director at News Corp since 1996.

I’m sure all these dudes (News Corp has one woman on their board – Natalie Bancroft) are all quite capable but it doesn’t strike me a terribly robust audit committee. Having said that, it’s been reported that News Corp’s independent directors have retained Debevoise & Plimpton to represent them. The audit committee is comprised entirely of independent directors (calling Mr. Knight “independent” seems like a stretch but whatevs) and maybe they could rattle off the laundry list of legal settlements but at least it appears they’re sorta on top of things now.

Senator Tom Coburn Explains What Tax Expenditures Are and What They Are Not

Earlier, we shared with you the thoughts of Americans for Tax Reform on Oklahoma Senator Tom Coburn’s rock-inspired “Back in Black” deficit reduction plan. Despite a silver lining that will allow whiny rich liberals to pay more taxes if they so choose, ATR wasn’t impressed, calling it a “Trillion Dollar Tax Hike.”

This is partly because Senator Coburn proposes the elimination of many tax expenditures. Of course, if you’re confused about what exactly a “tax expenditure” is, Senator Coburn took the time to explain it to everyone:

Tax expenditures are not tax cuts,” he said. “Tax expenditures are socialism and corporate welfare. Tax expenditures are increases on anyone who does not receive the benefit or can’t hire a lobbyist or special interest group to manipulate the code to their favor.”

It doesn’t appear that ATR has weighed in on this yet (and they are fond of quoting Coburn) but we don’t mind waiting.

House pursues balanced-budget bill; need for backup plan acknowledged [WaPo via TaxVox]
Earlier:
Did the Georgia Tea Party Call Grover Norquist a Socialist?

Goldman Sachs CFO: Layoffs Are About the Numbers

Goldman Sachs Group Inc. […] Chief Financial Officer David Viniar said the investment bank could layoff 1,000 employees globally as part of $1.2 billion in cost cuts.

During a conference call with analysts, Viniar said the potential headcount reduction is “as we sit here now and, of course, things can change,” adding that such layoffs would “come over the course of this year.” Viniar said the cuts could be “some senior, some junior people,” but “it’s really more dollar focused than head focused.” [MW]

How Does Americans for Tax Reform Feel About Tom Coburn’s “Back in Black” Deficit Reduction Plan?

It’s no secret that Grover Norquist’s patience with Tom Coburn ran out long ago. This hasn’t stopped Coburn from throwing out his own deficit reduction plan – entitled “Back in Black” – in order to save us all from fighting over scraps in the street. Predictably, Americans for Tax Reform has responded in due course, only they’re calling it “A Trillion Dollar Tax Hike Plan.” Maybe that’s not as bad as it sounds? Let’s take a look at some highlights:

Okay, is this really a trillion dollar tax hike? Reports say that it will save $9 trillion.

There is no rate reduction whatsoever in this plan. It’s a set of tax hikes, plain and simple.

But clearly, taxes and tax reform are complicated. Any chance we can address that?

There is no tax reform in this plan. The plan would undermine prospects for long-term tax reform.

A 600-page proposal clearly doesn’t happen without some planning. Tom Coburn must have had a plan. What was it?

It’s now clear Senator Coburn’s plan all along was a trillion dollar tax hike. Senator Coburn pretended to care about ethanol (until he was forced to admit he supported the ethanol mandate, the cause of 98% of government-induced ethanol production). In reality, he wanted to lay the groundwork for GOP support of this trillion dollar tax hike plan.

Tom Coburn has a reputation for being a staunch conservative. Does he live up to that reputation?

The Coburn trillion dollar tax hike is far outside the mainstream of the conservative movement, as well as where Congressional Republicans are.

Is there anything good about Coburn’s proposal?

ATR has long called for a “tax me more” checkoff for limousine liberals who complain that their taxes aren’t high enough. Rather than hiking taxes on everyone, these rich liberals should be able to pay more voluntarily to assuage their left-wing guilt. The Coburn plan does have this, providing a silver lining to an otherwise cloudy forecast for taxpayers.

And you probably thought ATR couldn’t say anything nice about the plan.

Senator Tom Coburn Proposes Trillion Dollar Tax Hike Plan [ATR]

Accounting News Roundup: Coburn Offers Up Deficit Reduction Plan; RIP Borders; NYSSCPAs Suggests RTRP Exam Include Sample 1040 | 07.19.11

Bank of America Has Record Loss on Bad Home Loans [Bloomberg]
Bank of America Corp. (BAC) posted the biggest quarterly loss in the lender’s history after Chief Executive Officer Brian T. Moynihan booked more costs tied to defective mortgages. The shares rose 1 percent in early trading as the outlook for credit losses improved. The second-quarter loss of $8.83 billion, or 90 cents a share, compared with profit of $3.12 billion, or 27 cents, a year earlier, the Charlotte, North Carolina-based lender said today in a statement. Provisions for future credit losses dropped 60 percent, the bank said, and profit excluding one-s was 33 cents a share, beating the 29-cent average estimate of 21 analysts surveyed by Bloomberg.

Coburn deficit plan offers $9 trillion in savings [WaPo]
Sen. Tom Coburn (R-Okla.) on Monday released a plan that he says would achieve $9 trillion in deficit savings over the next decade through a combination of far-reaching spending cuts, entitlement reform and increased tax revenue. “This plan offers the American people 9 trillion reasons to stop making excuses and start solving the problems in Washington,” Coburn said at a Monday afternoon news conference announcing the 600-plus-page plan. “I have no doubt that both parties will criticize this plan, and I welcome that debate. But it’s not a legitimate criticism until you have a plan of your own.”

News Corp. Said to Consider Naming Chase Carey as CEO, Succeeding Murdoch [Bloomberg]
News Corp. executives who watched Murdoch, 80, rehearse for his appearance had concerns about how he handled questions, according to three people, who weren’t authorized to speak publicly. Murdoch and his son James are scheduled to discuss the company’s role in the alleged phone hacking of murder victims, members of the royal family and others by the News of the World, which was closed on July 10.

Accounting `Red Flags’ Drive Bond Spreads to Record Levels: China Credit [Bloomberg]
Borrowing costs have risen to record levels for Chinese companies marked with “red flags” by ratings firms for unclear financial reporting and high levels of private ownership. The extra yield investors demand to own the bonds of Nine Dragons Paper Holdings Ltd. (2689), LDK Solar Co. and Road King Infrastructure Ltd. (1098) instead of similar-maturity government debt widened to all-time highs after they were named by Fitch Ratings or Moody’s Investors Service for issues such as having changeable profit margins or long-serving independent directors.

Borders Forced to Liquidate, Close All Stores [WSJ]
Borders, which employs about 10,700 people, scrapped a bankruptcy-court auction scheduled for Tuesday amid the dearth of bids. It said it would ask a judge Thursday to approve a sale to liquidators led by Hilco Merchant Resources and Gordon Brothers Group. The company said liquidation of its remaining 399 stores could start as soon as Friday, and it is expected to go out of business for good by the end of September.

Study: Tax Credit Had ‘Fleeting’ Effect on Housing Markets [WSJ]
Critics of last year’s $8,000 tax credits for home purchases routinely argued that the credits were unlikely to do more than offer sellers the chance to boost their sale price by the amount of the tax credit. Those critics won’t be surprised, then, by a new paper that finds—you guessed it—that average listing prices rose by around $8,000 in the month after the signing of the first major tax credit, and that they fell by slightly less than $9,000 two months after the tax credits expired.

Is Green Mountain Coffee Roasters serving double talk to the press? [WCF]
Warning: the bullshit out of GMCR is extremely hot!

Huron Consulting Group Appoints Chief Financial Officer [Huron Consulting]
C. Mark Hussey has quite the alphabet soup on his résumé – CPA, CMA, CFA.

New York CPAs Give IRS a To-Do List for Tax Prep Exam [AT]
“A practical section involving the preparation of a sample return is essential,” wrote Jonathan Horn and Vincent J. Cosenza, the chair and vice chair, respectively, of the NYSSCPA Taxation of Individuals Committee. he exam taker should complete not only a sample Form 1040, they suggested. The exam should also cover, at a minimum, a variety of tax law areas required to properly complete a 1040. The three-to-four hour test should include a combination of multiple-choice questions, short-answer questions, and at least one essay question that that would “test the applicants’ ability to communicate tax concepts to their clients.”

(UPDATE 2) Bucknell Accounting Student Accused of Being Serial Flasher

Earlier today I was tipped to this story about a man accused of being a serial flasher in central Pennsylvania. Last week WHTM reported that Jay Patrick Knaub, a “straight-A student at Bucknell University” was accused of “20 counts including unlawful contact with minors, indecent exposure, and open lewdness.”

Right. So you can use your imaginations about what “lewd act” actually is but personally, “jerking off” or “spit-shining the ol’ water pump” comes immediately to mind. Maybe you have other ideas.

ANYWAY, Our tipster informed us that “this gentlemen may, in fact, be a [Big 4 firm] summer intern out of the Philadelphia office.” Right now I cannot confirm the firm in question but did find that a Jay Patrick Knaub who is a junior at Bucknell with a major in accounting. And yes, I also found a Jay Patrick Knaub on the prison list at Dauphin County Prison.

All this dong exposure started a few of weeks ago and fairly crude police sketch was put together before Knaub was arrested. Apparently, Knaub was getting pretty confident in his skills as the third incident allegedly occurred one block from the police department. Knaub was arrested on July 1 thanks to tips, “especially the description of Knaub as a ‘computer geek,'” as the Fox43 anchor put it.

I called Dauphin County Prison to see what I could find out more about the possible internship but the very nice woman who helped said that Mr. Knaub wasn’t interested in speaking with me. I also left a message with his attorney, Mr. Boyle, but have not heard back as of yet. Of course if you’re familiar with Mr. Knaub or worked with him, please get in touch. Updates to come.

UPDATE:
Some have noted in the comments that Jay Knaub hasn’t been found in their respective directories. This is because he isn’t in any directory. From our tipster:

I know that he was an audit intern, and was working on some of our Harrisburg area clients. From what I’ve been able to gather, he was fired a few weeks ago, but nobody was really told why. One of the other interns who went through training with him saw the story online [Monday], and it’s been circulating the office ever since.

Assuming Knaub was fired shortly after his arrest (over two weeks ago), the firm would have wasted no time in removing his name from the directory. I called the Philadelphia office of the firm in question, asked to be connected to Knaub but was told that he was not in the directory.

UPDATE 2:
If you’ve checked the directory lately, looking for Knaub’s name, you’ll find that it’s no longer in the directory. I’ve reached out to the registrar to find out what the story is but have yet to hear back. Will keep you updated.