When accounting goes unaccounted for
Enjoy this day created just for you! But don’t spill any. Those who do are the first to get “coached out” or put on PIPs. Plus those Kool-Aid stains are hard to get out of your clothes.
Have a great weekend, everyone.
On Monday we briefly mentioned the unfortunate case of Colin Tenner, a former PricewaterhouseCoopers partner that is suing the firm for disability discrimination. He is claiming that after he took a leave from the firm after “mismanagement by PwC and bullying by a client,” after which, negotiations for him to return to the firm fell apart and he was let go.
Now the Times Online is reporting some of the feelings of Tenner’s fellow partners. In January 2007, Mr Tenner took sick leave for a couple of days and that did not sit well with his fellow partner Hugh Crossey:
While Mr Tenner was on sick leave in January 2007, his managing partner, Hugh Crossey, e-mailed a third partner to say that he had heard that Mr Tenner was ill again and that the firm needed to point out that “real partners simply do not get sick”, it was alleged.
Depression? Anxiety? Apparently those aren’t real sicknesses, according to Hugh. But wait! Hugh wasn’t the only ones that thought Tenner was a total wuss. The tribunal also heard that a member of PwC’s “partner affairs team” (which probably has nothing to do with treating people like whores) wrote to the firm’s chief medical officer (?) “that there was a ‘very strongly held view that [Mr Tenner] was not as unwell’ as he claimed.” So not only is he total sissy, he’s also a faker.
Tenner claimed that his health had deteriorated to the point that it led him to “actively research ways of committing suicide,” although he actually never made any attempts on his own life.
PwC maintains that this mental health thing is all bullshit, sticking with the standard communiqué, “We believe that his claim is completely without merit and we will vigorously contest it.”
PwC manager told Colin Tenner ‘real partners do not get sick’ [Times Online]
There are clues:
We hope you are settling into your new role and that things are going well!
The purpose of this email is to make you aware of some important information regarding the year end performance management process that applies to all new campus hires and all newly hired associates/administrative assistants for this year.
The firm recognizes that as a recent new hire, your primary focus is to transition into your role and responsibilities and build your network. It is important that you have the appropriate amount of time to learn about the firm and integrate fully before you are formally evaluated on your performance. Therefore, for this performance year, which ends June 30, 2011, you will not be assigned a performance rating.
Even though you will not receive a rating, you will participate fully in all other aspects of the performance process, such as getting feedback from individuals you work with and meeting with your counselor to discuss your feedback, progress, development and goals for the 2012 fiscal year. We are confident that even without a performance rating for this year, you can fully understand how you are doing by asking the right questions and having meaningful conversations with those you work with.
In the meantime, please make sure you are getting periodic feedback and staying in touch with your counselor. As the year end process approaches you can access helpful tools that will help you prepare for a variety of coaching conversations
Further, you can learn more about the Performance Management and Development process by clicking here.
If you would like to discuss this further please contact your counselor or your People Consultant. Thank you for your participation in this important process.
Take a stab in the comments and feel free to speculate as to the motivation and repercussions behind “all (wo)men are rated equal.”
Nothing like a good (alleged) fraud story to finish up our week, eh?
Just in case you missed the story, it appears as though KPMG UK will be a tad busy in the near term trying to unravel this little mess. I suppose that’s good news for the kids working those 4 day work weeks across the pond, though the same cannot be said for JPM, who is facing an unlimited fine as a result.
UK’s Daily Mail:
More, after the jump
The FSA has called in a top firm of accountants to examine the bank’s London activities after evidence emerged that JP Morgan had mixed customers’ funds with its own.
Banks are meant to maintain a strict segregation of their own money from that which is held on behalf of clients.
But JP Morgan managers in London discovered last month that client and bank money used for trading futures and options – a way of speculating on movements in currencies, share prices and commodities – had apparently been put into a single pool.
This isn’t the first time regulatory authorities have busted firms for pooling client money and using it to play craps in the market but it is certainly the first time the FSA has gone after a big player like JP Morgan.
JP Morgan claims an “operational error” in their options and futures arm dating as far back as 2002 caused the “mix-up” though we aren’t sure we buy that line. “We identified an operational error that was corrected within 24 hours of its discovery. No clients have lost money as a result of this error and we are cooperating fully with the FSA,” a spokeswoman for the bank said.
Sure, okay. Just because no clients lost any money doesn’t make it legal. It’s now up to KPMG to slog through 7 years of transactions (at JPM’s expense) to see if any clients missed out on interest due as a result. Prelim findings are due to the FSA by the end of August, with a final report expected in September.
Have fun, KPMG UK!