Which actor would you most like to hear perform a dramatic reading of accounting rules or the IRC?

Would you want someone like Ian McKellan or Patrick Stewart? Christopher Walken? Oscar Isaac? Or, for the ladies, maybe Jennifer Lawrence? Keira Knightly? Natalie Portman? Maggie Smith? If you're thinking more nostalgic, you'd go with Dustin Diamond or Molly Ringwald? The possibilities are endless so please provide a rationale for your choice.