Unfounded Rumor of the Day: Fired Koss VP Had Garage Sales at Her Desk

Posted on by Caleb Newquist

Or something like that. Guest 28 put it out there that Sue Sachdeva was flipping those designer threads to fellow employees for low low prices.
On the one hand, maybe the two employees on leave that worked for Suze were the bargain shoppers. On the other, how hard up for extra money was this woman? Maybe she just wore it out once with the tags on and said “I don’t love it”? Can anyone in the Milwaukee area that hasn’t already gone to happy hour confirm this? Get on the horn.

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Reason #10,308 to Not Engage in Dubioius Accounting Practices

So! Thinking about getting a little aggressive with the accounting? Forget aggressive, let’s just say you need to make your numbers next quarter come hell or high water? Maybe there are some pesky internal controls that you would really, really like to get around. For the good of the company of course.

Do whatcha gotta do but before you do, consider the sentence of Charles McCall, the former chairman of McKesson Corp. first. If, after reading his story, you decide it’s still worth the risk, then proceed with your plans.

A former chairman of San Francisco-based McKesson Corp. has been sentenced in federal court to 10 years in prison for securities fraud in an accounting scheme that cost shareholders $8.6 billion in 1999.

Charles McCall, 65, of Delray Beach, Fla., was given the prison term by U.S. District Judge William Alsup in San Francisco on Friday.

McCall was convicted by a jury in Alsup’s court in November of four counts of securities fraud and one count of circumventing the company’s internal accounting controls.
…
Prosecutors said that in the fraud, HBO & Co. and McKesson HBOC inflated revenues by backdating software sales and concealing side letters that would have allowed buyers to cancel proposed purchases that the company had counted as revenue.

This poor bastard got sentenced to 10 years (at 65, he’ll be lucky if manages to serve the full sentence) and he probably doesn’t know a internal control from his ass, other than at one time, he thought it was enough of a hindrance that he’d just ignore it altogether. If anyone has an extra copy of COSO laying around, kindly send it his way. He’ll have time to get caught up on the idea.

Ex-McKesson chairman gets 10 year sentence [SF Chronicle]

Freaky Fraud: The Woman Who Stole $110,000 in Bull Semen From Her Employer

First, if you hate your inventory counts, can you only imagine what it’s like to have to keep tabs on tank after tank of frozen bull semen? Count your blessings, people.

A woman in Ohio pleaded not guilty last week to stealing a tank of bull semen valued at $110,000 from her employer. Authorities say 45 year-old Karen Saum planned to use the semen to extort money out of her employer – the rightful owner of the sperm – to start her own business. I can only imagine what kind of business she planned on starting with the seed money.

Detectives said a tip led them to Saum’s garage, where they found the stolen semen. Just a tip.

Det. James Hollopeter told WHIO TV that Saum used her knowledge of the company’s internal workings to lift only the high quality semen. “She knew where this semen would have been located,” he said. “It was actually locked in an interior closet because it was more valuable that some of the other that they had out.”

Right. Because everyone knows you don’t leave the good shit lying around where any old creepy criminal can get their paws on it.