KPMG released a one-minute video yesterday teasing KPMG Lakehouse, its new $450 million training and development center that is scheduled to open next January in the Orlando community of Lake Nona. And woo-boy, is it cheesy—replete with uplifting music, black turtlenecks, people using tablets, selfies, and the sun glistening off the water.
Located on a sprawling 55-acre site five miles from Orlando International Airport, the 800,000-square-foot (reportedly) KPMG Lakehouse (aka Kamp KPMG, aka KPMG Kompound) will take care of pretty much everything for visiting Klynveldians, except wiping their asses for them:
Mobile applications will guide learners through each day and maximize the experience—helping with everything from registration, schedules, dining and exercise options, and connecting with fellow learners on site.
Once KPMG’s best and brightest pass through the hallowed gates of KPMG Lakehouse, they’ll find:
800 single-occupancy guest rooms, 90 learning and innovation spaces, a 1,000-seat assembly hall, and an Ignition Center where professionals can meet with clients to explore potential disruptors, new business models, and breakthrough solutions.
But seriously, no one cares about that shit. They’ll want to know where they can dance and find food and booze:
The 55-acre site will also include multiple dining areas, a separate social venue and numerous fitness and recreational amenities to support the firm’s focus on health and well-being.
Apparently, up to 800 KPMG partners and professionals will come to the Lakehouse each week for hands-on, collaborative learning experiences. Word to the wise, young Klynveldians: If an audit partner is leading a session on how to steal PCAOB inspection plans without getting caught, turn and walk the other way.
I guess it remains to be seen how KPMG Lakehouse will compare to Deloitte University (aka DU, aka Deloitte Disneyland, aka Deloitte Delta Chi) as far as lavish accommodations go. And debauchery.
KPMGers, hear anything else being planned for the Lakehouse? Shag carpeting? Indoor basketball courts? Phil Mickelson meet-and-greets? Let us know in the comments or email me and Adrienne.
