September 24, 2020

How To Tell If the Hot Auditor Is Trying To Tell You She Wants You

I don't read Cosmo because, well, I already know 50 Ways to Drive My Man Wild (49 of them involve Bravo Juliets and one involves things I'd rather not admit I do, amiright ladies?) but while combing the Internet for elusive hot accountants to add to our Accounting Hotties board on Pinterest, I came across this question posted on Cosmo Confidential.

It's old but I only post it here so we can have a candid, adult discussion about lusting after auditors.

Self-described "Life of the Party" and 46-55 executive Hubbyochris asks:

Our accountants are across the hall doing their annual audit. One of them is a beautiful, 25-30 year old woman who always dresses conservatively, like today she is wearing a heavy black sweater and gray slacks.

But she always wears 3 inch heels, usually stillettoes.

What do you think, is she being stylish or discreetly sexy?

We've had this conversation before but we might need to continue having it until everyone is on the same page. First of all, 3 inch heels aren't really that big of a deal. The official "CFM" heel length is 5 inches if I am not mistaken, and even that is up for debate. Clear, acrylic or overly studded heels as worn by strippers are definitely whore heels but just because a woman is wearing sexy shoes does not mean she is sending a signal to you to rip her clothes off in the storage closet (unless, again, they're made of acrylic, in which case you might as well go grab some $1 bills and have some fun). Many women – myself included – wear these shoes because we like how they make us feel. If we wanted to say "CFM," many of us would just come out and say that. Got it, guys?

Let's also consider that no one likes the auditors, least of all the auditors themselves. So it would make sense that the hot ones would at least have the self-respect to put on something nice to feel better about the fact that they are basically box-checkers sent to annoy the crap out of the client.

I highly doubt that any self-respecting auditor would specifically get dolled up just to snag herself a date at the client but maybe I'm wrong. Any auditor hot enough to tempt the executives at the client's office could probably do much better on the street and would value her job enough not to mix business and pleasure.

My vote? She's being stylish and dude is a douche. Again, that's just me. Any hot female auditors or delusional male executives between 46 – 55 are welcome to tell me I'm wrong in the comments.

 

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