October 27, 2020

Deloitte’s New CEO Made Up Stories to Leave Work — Just Like Us!

One of the many services we provide around here is to read boring interviews with the leaders of the accounting profession. No need to thank us, it's part of the job.

The majority of these Q&As are filled with platitudes and anecdotes that do little more than extend a narrative of how great the firm is, overcoming adversity or something, the time they left or almost left the firm, what they're doing to make it even better place to work, etc. It's all pretty nauseating, although every once in a while we find something of interest and try to write about it; again, part of the job.

This chat with new Deloitte CEO Cathy Engelbert at the Washington Post is no different. Because she's the first female CEO of a major accounting firm there's plenty back and forth about that, but really the best thing we can offer you is her admission that, YEP, she made up stories to get the hell out of work so she could, God forbid, spend some time with her kids:

I used to make up stories if I had to leave early for something related to my kids. I learned my lesson, because a woman who left the firm actually shared that she was leaving because she didn’t have kids yet, she wasn’t even married, but she saw people like me and didn’t want to be like that—always working.  

Cathy doesn't do this anymore, of course, she's CEO! She does what she damn well pleases!

Anyway, it's good to know that CEOs are comfortable fibbing to unreasonable co-workers who don't have a shred of empathy. I'm sure the guilt trips and passive aggressive emails will be eradicated from this day forward.

So next time your daughter has a dance recital, don't have to make up a story like, "Oh, my golden retriever has arthritis and I have to give him his medication by 6 pm."  Just say, "I'm going to a dance recital for my daughter. Later, loser."

Alternatively, you can make up completely unbelievable excuses like, "Oh, I'm leaving because my pet iguana is being launched into space later this year and he has training every Tuesday and Thursday. PROBLEM?" 

Or something to that effect.

Cathy Engelbert on becoming Deloitte’s first female CEO [WaPo]

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