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Deloitte University Is Getting Bigger Because God Forbid KPMG Have the Superior Brainwashing Compound

Dallas Morning News reported yesterday that groundbreaking on a “massive expansion” of the already massive Deloitte University campus in Westlake, Texas will begin in January. Deloitte’s been wanting to expand for a while but was waiting on Tarrant County commissioners to approve more than $5 million in tax breaks. “We certainly appreciate the great corporate citizen that Deloitte has been in our area,” said commissioner Gary Fickes to Dallas Morning News when the expansion was still up in the air last summer.

The expansion will add eight buildings across at least 300,000 square feet to the existing 700,000 square foot campus and 25 full-time jobs to the metropolitan Dallas job market. A five-story building opening in 2025 will include “classrooms, meeting rooms, outdoor roof terrace, food and beverage and approximately 300 guest rooms.” And if classrooms aren’t your thing, they’re also working on walking and biking trails, lakes, seating, and landscaping.

Deloitte University is nestled about 30 miles northwest of Dallas and currently a quarter-mile-long. The “cultist brainwashing compound” is known best for its superior food offerings, the brisket in particular is a thing of legend. Deloitte Disneyland hosts about 65,000-70,000 people each year and according to the firm, more than half a million people have visited the grounds since it launched in 2011. Do they still have alcohol-fueled Jenga and karaoke competitions?

Here’s a promo video from Deloitte for you to look upon with awe. It’s not a sprawling communist-style housing block, it’s a learning center.