October 31, 2020

Awkward Sexual Advances And Your Drinking Problems – A Holiday Guide from Rothstein Kass

Hopefully this week is light for you and your cohorts, giving you some time to clean up your inboxes, hide frat party photos from your new Facebook Timeline, or finish up last minute holiday shopping. Here at GC we are already feeling the holiday hangover so luckily the email and “official” attachment below provided us with a good ol’ fashioned “WTF.”

Happy Moanday, folks.  Hopefully this week is light for you and your cohorts, giving you some time to clean up your inboxes, hide frat party photos from your new Facebook Timeline, or finish up last minute holiday shopping.  Here at GC we are already feeling the holiday hangover so luckily the email and "official" attachment below provided us with a good ol' fashioned "WTF."

Hi GC,

After reading about the Deloitte PPT story, I thought I'd contribute to the postings by forwarding the attached. This is what they send out one year right before the holiday party at Rothstein Kass (SF office). I'm sure this went around the entire RKCO offices across the states.

Enjoy!
Ex-Auditor

Some highlights:

1. Plan to drink moderately, if at all.  One too many may lead to a career setback.

2. Leave anything short, tight or revealing in the closet.

3. Don't treat the office party like a singles bar.

4. If the crowd you are with is drinking to excess and you are pressured to join in, order a decoy.

5. Eat a small meal before attending.  You won't be hungry, enabling you to focus on the conversation rather than the buffet table.

That's right people, keep your mini skirts and Ed Hardy t-shirts at home.  And whatever you do, remember to pre-game the damn buffet table.  We wouldn't want you to fill up on room temperature food that you've worked all year to earn the right to enjoy.  The objective is to leave just as hungry and sober as you were when you arrived.

Closing thought: Being that this was sourced from the San Francisco office, we're shocked that sharing a doobie with your senior was not addressed.  More of a "don't ask, don't tell, just pass it down the line" policy, perhaps. 

What kind of shenanigans did your coworkers and/or you get into this year?  Share in the comments.

Full memo:

Do's Don'Ts at Office Party

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