Earlier today we brought up some less-than gentlemanly behavior going on at PwC Ireland. However, that wasn't the first story of misuse of email coming from the Emerald Isle. You may recall a few bros at KPMG asking for some assistance winning a trip to Whistler, which was received with mixed reviews in the States. Anyway! Now comes the story – courtesy of our sister from another mister, Dealbreaker – about another KPMG associate maybe not using the best judgment, sharing his plans for putting the moves on a special lady friend with his mate over firm email. From: Ian [redacted] Sent: 22 October 2010 10:24 To: John [redacted] Subject: RE: Wed Good night on wed man. Good old craic. Any luck with the ladies Kind Regards, Ian [redacted] Financial Services Audit 2 Harbourmaster Place IFSC Dublin ____________________________________________________________________________ From: John [redacted] Sent: 22 October 2010 10:28 To: Ian [redacted] Subject: RE: Wed Was a very good night. Got very messy in the end. No luck with the ladies. Had my eyes on this one girl, [redacted]. Some piece of work. But bottled it in the end _________________________________________________________________________________ From: Ian [redacted] Sent: 22 October 2010 10:45 To: John [redacted] Subject: RE: Wed I know the one your talking about alright. Shes friends with one of my mates in my year. Seems like a nice girl. Gonna chance it next time _____________________________________________________________________________ From: John [redacted] Sent: 22 October 2010 11:24 To: Ian [redacted] Subject: RE: Wed Definiately going to stick the head in next time. Falling behind on this whole k score thing. Need to get on board. Shes top notch in fairness What u reckon? ______________________________________________________________________________ From: Ian [redacted] Sent: 22 October 2010 11:40 To: John [redacted] Subject: RE: Wed Ya, sure go for it if you like her _____________________________________________________________________________ From: John [redacted] Sent: 22 October 2010 11:48 To: Ian [redacted] Subject: RE: Wed Alright next thurs, im gonna stick the head in. Just wait for the right moment. (When shes drunk) and she cant say no. Got this unreal technique for scoring aswel, called the whisper. I pretend im whispering in her ear and when shes not looking I just kiss her. The element of surprise throws then off and BOOM. ______________________________________________________________________________________________ From: Ian [redacted] Sent: 22 October 2010 12:04 To: [the girl] Subject: Wed Hey [girl], Thought id give u the heads up about this chap John here. Think he has some serious plans for you __________________________________________________________________________ From: [everyone who was forwarded this] To: [everyone they know] Subject: read from the bottom up!!!
Related Posts
KPMG Vice Chair Hopes All the Tech Layoffs Will Scare College Kids Into Accounting
- Adrienne Gonzalez
- January 26, 2023
KPMG Vice Chair Greg Engel has been having trouble sleeping lately. It isn’t climate change […]
(UPDATE) KPMG Will be Stingy with the Letterhead From Now On
- Caleb Newquist
- November 25, 2009
Have you been craving a tech startup accounting scandal? Thought so. Enter Canopy Financial, Inc. who “provides technology-enabled electronic payment, account management, and investment technology platforms for health savings accounts, flexible spending accounts, and health reimbursement arrangements.”
The company was ranked #12 in the 2009 Inc. 500 List of fastest growing companies in America:
In 2008 CEO Vikram Kashyap said his company had 2007 revenues of $9 million. More recently, we’ve heard, the company was saying they’d hit $60 million in revenue and $9 million or so in EBITDA.
All of this may have been lies.
Until recently all the venture capitalists involved proudly placed Canopy Financial on their portfolio pages. Now all trace of the company have been erased from the portfolio pages of investors GGV Capital, Spectrum Equity and Foundation Capital. And their investment bank has erased them from their trophy page as well.
So what happened? Multiple sources have told us that Canopy was absolutely making up their financial statements, even forging audited statements with fake KMPG [sic] letterhead. And somehow the investment bank and all the investors never figured it out.
Jesus, this doesn’t even qualify as cooking the books. This is more along the lines of:
CFO: No, we cannot say $100 kajillion.
CEO: Why?
CFO: Because no one will believe it.
CEO: Why?
CFO: Do you know what a kajillion looks like?
CEO: Um, no.
CFO: It has to look like a real number. I’m saying $59,984,387.
CEO: What about…
CFO: Shut up, that’s the number.
Then all you have to do is get your hands on some KPMG letterhead and BAM your company is listed in a magazine.
We tried contacting KPMG about this but our emails have gone unreturned. We’ll let you know if we hear back from them. In the meantime, if you know anything more about this particular story, enlighten us in the comments.
UPDATE: See the clarification about the authenticity of the letterhead on our post from December 3rd.
Canopy Financial Accused Of Serious Financial Fraud, Investors Burned [Tech Crunch via FINS]
U.K.’s Audit Regulator Wants to Find Out Exactly Why KPMG Is Such a Hot F*cking Mess
- Jason Bramwell
- April 2, 2019
From the Wall Street Journal: The U.K. watchdog for accounting and audit on Tuesday launched […]
