When accounting goes unaccounted for
Now we’re talking! Nothing like calling your shot.
Moritz did his best Joe Namath today on PwC’s firm wide webcast today (is it over?) so all that speculation of P. Dubs phoning in 2010 can be put to rest. WRITE. IT. DOWN.
If you’ve got other thoughts or details on the web cast, get in touch and discuss in the comments.
If you’re a sustainability professional, people might make the assumption that you are a tree hugger. A green weenie. A dirty hippie. A person who has as much need for a pair of wing tips or business appropriate pumps as a fully loaded H2. Well you can put those suspicions to bed my friends.
Above is PUMA CEO Jochen Zeitz along with a couple of guys from environmental consulting firm Trucost and PwC sustainability partner Alan McGill. As you can see, Mr. Zeitz and the Trucost boys opted for some “green” sneakers to go with their Brooks Brothers. Mr. McGill, on the other hand, is in the standard issue Allen Edmonds. The reason for not getting on board with the hip skids? He’s lame:
The firm’s sustainability partner jokingly suggested his job was too dull to warrant a jazzy pair of sneakers.
Sceptic Tank reports that a PwC spokeswoman clarified the meaning of “dull” to be “PwC can’t be seen to be promoting their clients products in any way.” Which probably also explains why McGill wore a tie as well. Can’t be too careful about these things.
PwC and the fashion faux pas [The Sceptic Tank]
As we’ve discussed, some farewell emails can be morbidly melodramatic while others are a bitter “good riddance” that makes you pity the poor bastards that will hear your former colleague’s cynical musings.
The latest Big 4 sendoff comes courtesy of PwC and we only share it with you because, well, we don’t know what to make of our hero’s crime fighting dreams.
Friends,
It is with a great mixture of emotions that I leave the firm today. As many of you know, I never imagined myself as a mild-mannered accountant. I always thought that there was a greater destiny out there for me, a tale of wonder and adventure, a story most r careful consideration and consultation with my closest companions, I’ve decided to leave PwC in order to become a costumed vigilante of the night.
It wasn’t an easy decision; declaring war on crime never is. There will be some hard nights ahead of me as I craft the tools necessary to take back this city. Intense martial arts training and an iron-clad will might not be enough, but it’s all we got. Where evil lurks in the hearts of men, where innocents are lost and forgotten, where citizens call out for a savior, I will be there. Rest easy, Baltimore, your avenging knight has arrived.
I am vengeance. I am the night. I. AM. BATMAN.
[Bruce Wayne]
[brucewayne]@gmail.comP.S. Could everyone do me a solid and keep my new secret identity to themselves? It’ll make avenging the weak a lot easier if super-villains aren’t bugging me at my new job all the time. Thanks.
Okaaay, so lots to discuss here. For starters, the lack of originality is dreadful. Batman is TAKEN you DOLT. Secondly, Batman is a scientist; you’ve got an accounting degree. Unless you’ve been whipping out a engineering/chemistry/physics set in your cubicle testing gadgets, we’re pretty sure a cap gun will be more effective than anything you’ll be strapped with. Thirdly, this is BALTIMORE we’re talking about. We’ve only spent a little bit of time there but if The Wire is as realistic as its creators say it is, this dude will last all of two seconds. Now, it’s possible that this could be a comic nerd trying to give his friends a laugh on his way out the door but what if we are dealing with another Phoenix Jones?
So if our hero is serious, we’re guessing you can count on a future report from the local Baltimore news detailing the injuries suffered by the masked avenger/former accountant.
Did you think that the Big 4 domination of all magazine lists was over? Jesus, were you wrong. Not only is PwC numero uno on Training Magazine’s Top 125, they’ve been in the top spot for three years running. Clearly this is solidifies the dynasty for P. Dubs.
Personally we don’t think it would be that hard to get on this particular list. You fly everyone to a relatively large city that has bars, casinos, and strip clubs near the hotel and you’ll get some positive feedback regardless of the boring topics discussed.
The magazine lists its criteria for measurement (and, shockingly, our criteria wasn’t mentioned) so we can understand how this index of companies was cooked up:
• Training tied to business objectives
• Demonstrable results
• Number of trainers
• Employee turnover and retention
• Leadership development
• Tuition assistance
• Training technology and infrastructure
• Certification
• Training budget and percentage of payroll
Because we know you’re wondering, only two other firms made it on to the list: KPMG at #5 and Grant Thornton at #103. So this begs the question: WTF E&Y and Deloitte? Completely SHUT OUT? Are your efforts being expended elsewhere? Deloitte’s diversity trainings don’t count? What about the Deloitte University plans; doesn’t that count for something? Sorry, E&Y; the donuts and secure bathrooms obviously don’t help you on this list.
Never mind those losers; back in Titletown, you had better believe P. Dubs put out a press release. Our favorite part being the last paragraph before the “About” section where it catalogs every list the firm has ever been on for the past decade and a half. We get the picture P. Dubs. You can make it on to lists. Good job. Please feel free to notify us directly for the next one.
Digitial Issue [Training Magazine]
