Accountants are not without their vices. Whether it be booze, sex, or DVRing every single HBO TV series, we all know someone who can’t quite break the spell of certain pleasures in life after they become addictive. Today in double-entry junkies, we meet David Harding. David loves sausages. He loves them so much that he has eaten at least one a day since the age of five. He loves them so much that he has undergone hypnosis to try and conquer his craving of salty pork links. He loves them so much that he was willing to do a live audition for the “Gluttony” role in Se7en.
Okay, I made that last part up but this accountant LOVES SAUSAGES:
A father-of-three has become the first person in Britain to undergo counselling after developing an unusual addiction to sausages. David Harding, 47, has paid out almost £2,000 in an attempt to beat his bizarre habit, which sees him eat up to 13 bangers per day.
Now if you think this is merely a man who lacks self-control, you’d be wrong. This is obsession, my friends:
He said: ‘I genuinely cannot bear the thought of living without sausages. ‘Drug addicts crave their medicine of choice, and it’s the same for me – except that my drug is a banger.’ Accountant David has eaten at least one sausage per day – in sandwiches, fry-ups or main meals – since the age of five. He spends up to £700 per year on bangers and has even bought a deep chest freezer to store the vast quantities of his favourite McWhinneys Irish pork sausages. David realised he could be an ‘addict’ last year when wife Susan decided to do ‘something different’ for dinner and failed to serve-up his usual fare. He said: ‘I went a bit mad at the thought of it. It threw me completely off-track. It was then that I realised something wasn’t quite right and sought professional help.’
As for these McWhinneys folks, they’re taking this in stride, much like a Philip Morris exec might:
McWhinney’s Sausages MD, Kevin McWhinney, said: ‘We are pleased that this gentleman likes our sausages, but wish him well in his quest to control his habit.’
Help me battle my SAUSAGE ADDICTION! Accountant forced to have counselling to get him off the bangers [Daily Mail via AwebUK]