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Wanted: North Dakota Tax Professionals Who Don’t Mind Stilettos And G-Strings

A tipster clues us in to the wild world of one small oil boomtown in North Dakota that’s going to need some pretty open-minded tax pros in town if things keep up:

CNNMoney
:

Forget Vegas. Strippers are discovering they can make ten times as much dancing in the oil boomtown of Williston, N.D.

Thousands of men have come here seeking high-paying jobs working for the oil companies. And, at the end of the day (or four or five days when they’re working on a rig), many of them are looking for some female companionship at one of the town’s two strip club’s [sic], Whispers or Heartbreakers.

Word has gotten out about just how much money can be made dancing in Williston’s strip clubs. The money is phenomenal, but the competition is stiff.

Whispers has received applications from exotic dancers in Hawaii, Alaska, even the Czech Republic and Germany, said Melissa Slapnicka, the co-owner of the club. She’s been bombarded with so many applications that she only gives each dancer a week to try out. If they don’t work out, they don’t come back, she said.

According to the article, one 36-year-old stripper (uhh…) who has traveled to Williston for dancing work over the last few years now finds herself making $2000 – $3000 in a single night. I don’t expect you guys to know this but that’s a lot of money for a stripper to make in a single evening.

Even on a slow night, Slapnicka says her girls are bringing home $1500.

Assuming her girls are 1099 employees, looks like there might be an opening for a qualified tax professional willing to help these successful strippers ensure their tax house is in order. Especially now that they’ve been featured in a major media outlet, you can rest assured the Shulman Army has been dispatched to keep an eye on their gains.

Paging The Tax Domme!

Texas ‘Pole Tax’ Gets Called Back to the Stage

[T]he Texas Supreme Court on Friday gave state officials the go-ahead to continue collecting a special $5-per-customer tax on strip clubs. The so-called “pole” tax, collected upon entrance to any club that features nude dancing and alcohol consumption, was ruled unconstitutional by a state district judge in Austin and the 3rd Court of Appeals. The law was passed by the Texas Legislature in 2007, and so far about $15 million has been collected. The money has not been disbursed because of the earlier court rulings. [HC via DMWT, Earlier]

KPMG Analysis Finds That a Fraudster’s Traits Mirror Those of Pretty Much Every Boss You’ve Ever Worked For

Of course not all of your bosses are crooks…or are…nah. But just to be on the safe side, make sure you’re giving the stinkeye to anybody with the following characteristics:

• Volatility and being melodramatic, arrogant and confrontational, threatening or aggressive, when challenged.

• Performance or skills of new employees in their unit do not reflect past experiences detailed on resumes.

• Unreliability and prone to mistakes and poor performance, with a tendency to cut corners and/or bend the rules, but makes attempts to shift blame and responsibility for errors.

• Unhappy, apparently stressed and under pressure, while bullying and intimidating colleagues.

• Being surrounded by “favorites,” or people who do not challenge the fraudster, and micromanaging some employees, while keeping others at arm’s length.

• Vendors/suppliers will only deal with this individual, who also may accept generous gestures that are excessive or contrary to corporate rules.

• Persistent rumors or indications of personal bad habits, addictions or vices, possibly with a lifestyle that seems excessive for their income, or apparently personally over-extended in their finances.

• Self-interested and concerned with their own agenda, and who has opportunities to manipulate personal pay and rewards

But as we all know, the ex-stripper wife is the clincher.

[via KPMG]

Note: Private Lap Dances Are Not Tax Exempt in New York

This one is for you, ladies of the night.

A 2005 audit by the New York Division of Taxation found gentlemen’s club Nite Moves owed over $125,000 in sales tax on door admissions and private lap dance sales. The club argued that dances are a performance, not a taxable “service.” We’ll leave that one alone.

A New York State appellate court ruled last Thursday that private lap dances are not a dramatic or musical art performance, despite Nite Moves’ claims to the contrary. It is unclear whether any state taxation authorities partook in said private lap dances to make this determination.

In this case, the burden of proof rested on the club, who did not provide enough evidence to satisfy their claim, according to the five judge panel that made the ruling. “In short, petitioner was denied the requested relief due not to the nature of its business but, rather, because of the inadequacy of its proof,” they said.

The club’s lawyer, Andrew McCullough, plans to appeal the decision. “We brought in the foremost expert in the field,” he said. “She is the one in this country who has made a complete and detailed study of the art of exotic dance and if they are not going to believe her I don’t know who you believe.”

That expert had not actually seen Nite Moves’ dancers but other, similar exotic performances. As any connoisseur of naked gyrating women knows, not all naked gyrating is created equal.

Tax laws in New York State require sales taxes to be collected and paid on admission to or the use of any place of amusement except for dramatic or musical arts performances.

Maybe if the strippers wore historical costumes or mime makeup they’d have a case.

Hey, Nite Moves, you really should have called the Tax Domme, she knows all about this stuff.

New York court rules private lap dances not tax exempt [Reuters]

Accounting Student Turned Stripper Not Too Familiar with Independent Contractor vs. Fulltime Employee Issues

The following post is republished from AccountingWEB UK, a source that delivers topical, practical content to accountants and accounting professionals.

Forget Patmore, a former accountancy and finance student is starring this week in what must surely be the employment and tax case of the year.

Lapdancer Nadine Quashie allegedly earned more than £1,000 a night dancing at the Stringfellows (NSFW) club London and is now trying to pursue an unfair dismissal through the Employment Tribunal after being fired in December 2008 following allegations of drug use and dealing.


On behalf of the club, Caspar Glyn argued that the dancer was not entitled to rights under the tribunal as she was self-employed. “To take off your clothes and be paid to do that, it is a curious, unusual situation… which is perhaps in itself unsuited to an employment relationship,” he told the tribunal.

Aiming another blow below the belt, he added that Quashie should be disqualified from having her case heard because she had misrepresented her tax affairs – in spite of having studied accountancy and finance at Thames Valley University for a year.

She took two years off her studies to hold a full-time position as women’s rights officer for the student union, but instead of returning to the course she turned to lapdancing.

She has told the tribunal that conditions at the club effectively meant dancers were employees and she should be entitled to a full tribunal hearing. Like other dancers, she was required to give up 25% in commission, with an additional £85 deducted for nightly fees.

While Stringfellows insisted she was self-employed, Quashie said she did not learn of her self-employed status until another dancer told her of the situation five months after she started working there.

This case has everything for employment and tax advisers, HMRC investigators and retired colonels from Tonbridge. In addition to the lurid claims of private, late night sessions with Peter Stringfellow and his friends, it presents a classic challenge for the badges of employment tests and some messy tax implications for all sides.

Purely hypothectically, how would you advise the participants in such a case? Back at the central London tribunal, meanwhile, judgment in the case has been reserved.

As Unlikely As It Might Be, We’re Rooting for Ken Starr and Wesley Snipes to Be Cellmates

While Wes continues to fight his conviction (sometimes using unorthodox methods) on tax evasion tooth and nail, Ken Starr is ready to get on with it and pleaded guilty today to charges related to his Ponzi to the Stars.


Government sentencing guidelines have Starr looking at 10 to 12.5 years which is long enough to outlast the appeals that Willie Mays Hayes has out there.

Since we’re not at all familiar with how convicts are assigned their prison quarters, our desire for an awkward reunion between Snipes and Starr that includes debating over who gets the top bunk is merely wishful thinking. If it lightning stirkes, we’ll just chalk it up to the gods smiling down on us all.

Financial Adviser to Stars Pleads Guilty to Fraud [NYT]