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Here’s a Visual: A 64 Year-old Accountant in Bed, Naked, with a Madame, Surrounded by Cash

In Britain, of course:

A respected accountant who turned his home into a brothel was caught in the act when police swooped and found him naked in bed with his Chinese mistress, surrounded by money.


“Respected accountant” Leslie Baleham received a year in prison after his house effectively became a brothel that managed to serve 400 men during a three-month stakeout, according to a report in the Daily Mail. How would an otherwise mild-mannered accountant get tangled up in such a mess? Love, of course!

The court was told that Baleham had been ‘smitten’ with his younger woman – who was a main figure in running the brothel.
Adrian Reynolds, prosecuting, said: ‘Never was the relationship between sex and money more clearly to be seen.’ [Ed. note: Oh, British wit.] The pair, who ran the brothel for two years, had a joint bank account and had paid in £57,000 – including £7,000 he had made in rent. Harry Bowyer, mitigating, told the court that Baleham was not involved in the day-to-day running of the brothel, and was effectively just a landlord. He said: ‘Baleham felt he was having a relationship with her. Now he feels he has been used by her. He is now divorced from his wife.’

Arrested in bed with a madame called Ping Ping, the ‘respected’ accountant who turned his home into a brothel [Daily Mail]

Former Deloitte Employee and Burgeoning Adult-themed Mobile App Entrepreneur Annabel McClellan Appears in Court, Sans Husband

Hard to believe it’s almost been two weeks since we mentioned alleged insider trader/justice obstructer/swinger app developer Annabel McClellan but time sure flies when you’re facing criminal charges, amiright?

Annabel made an appearance in criminal court yesterday but sadly, her husband and alleged insider trading conspirator, Arnold, was nowhere to be seen. You could probably conclude that someone has to watch the kids, since no one in Pacific Heights is interested in being associated with the couple at this point.


From the Bay Citizen:

[O]n Tuesday, Annabel McClellan was very much alone in court. Previously, she surrendered her British passport and posted $250,000 bail. If convicted of the obstruction of justice charge, she could face five years in prison. Potential damages in the SEC case could exceed $90 million.

Nanci Clarence, Annabel McClellan’s attorney, told U.S. District Court Judge William Alsup that she would need several months to adequately review the documents that U.S. federal prosecutors have handed over. As of Tuesday, the number of documents stood at 47,000.

While it’s pretty unlikely that My Nookie, the aforementioned mobil app that appears to be a Wheel of Position Fortunes, gets much attention in the documents, we can always hope. The fact that this will keep the McClellans tied up in court for months and maybe years to come, goes without saying but Ms. McClellan’s attorney – acting in her client’s best interest – opted to go there:

“This is a fairly complicated matter,” Clarence explained to Judge Alsup, who will also be presiding over the related SEC case against both McClellans. Additionally, Clarence said, there are “very extensive parallel proceedings in the United Kingdom. That proceeding [will] generate its own extensive discovery” of evidence. Assistant U.S. Attorney Adam Reeves, who is prosecuting the case, did not object to the delay.

As everyone agreed on April 5 as the next court date in the case, Alsup addressed McClellan, dressed all in black, who had stood quietly before him for the duration of the hearing, saying, “Ms. McClellan, welcome to the court. See you back in April.”

*Photo: Drew Altizer Photography via The Bay Citizen

University Officials Not Impressed with Accounting Professor’s Demonstration of “First in, First Out”

Since many of you are current or former accounting students, you undoubtedly, at one time or another during your depraved days running around the quad, had the thought creep into your mind, “What would happen if Professor Johnson decided to drop trou in the middle of class while discussing accounting for bonds?”

Unfortunately for students at Kennesaw State University, they now know the answer to that question:

Raymond Devaughn Taylor, 57, is accused of taking off his clothes during a class he was teaching, according to an arrest warrant obtained by the AJC. […] Taylor, who worked in the business department on a contract basis, taught an accounting class during the fall semester on Tuesdays and Thursdays, according to the class schedule posted on the university’s website.

“He will not be teaching again at KSU,” interim Provost Ken Harmon told the AJC.

Now, why this particular professor thought that pulling a Brett Favre on the entire class was a good idea is not entirely clear, as this particular method of impressing a target of your lust many years your junior has an abysmal track record. But as we alluded in the headline, maybe this was a unique teaching method on display. Or then again, perhaps students were showing their lack of interest and rather than scream and yell, Taylor figured this would hold the student’s attention better. OR simply, in the words of Cosmo, “Maybe uh, it needed some air. You know sometimes they need air, they can’t breathe in there. It’s inhuman.”

The theories are endless, really. Yours are welcome below and for the love of everything good and uproariously hilarious, if you were in this class, email us immediately.

[h/t TaxProf and The Summa – neither of whom would ever do such a thing]

Insider Trading Charges Throw a Wrench into Former Deloitte Employee’s Plans for Sexy Mobile App

[caption id="attachment_22306" align="alignright" width="260" caption="Drew Altizer Photography via The Bay Citizen"][/caption]

Having a nice Friday evening, Going Concern faithful? Wonderful. Ordinarily, we would leave you to your weekend activities but something came to our attention that simply couldn’t wait.

Earlier in the week, we told you ��������������������, the former Deloittians who were charged with insider trading by the SEC. Arnold and Annabel were giving tips to Annabel’s sister, Miranda Sanders, and her husband, James, who traded on the information. The SEC alleges that the scam amounted to approximately $23 million in gains for everyone involved.

For all intents and purposes, Arnold McClellan probably was your run-of-the-mill tax partner at Deloitte until he opted to use his insider knowledge to make some money for himself and his in-laws. Likewise, you might expect that Annabel was just a humdrum Deloitte employee who landed a partner (he’s 13 years her senior) who got involved in a insider trading scam. But someone sent us a link to a report in the Bay Citizen that informs us that she had a very interesting venture in the works.

You see, Annabel left the firm (exactly when, is unclear) after working in the London, San Jose and San Francisco offices and presumably was ready to be a stay-at-home mom. When that became monotonous, she and a friend figured they would take their interest in knockin’ boots to launch a mobile app called “My Nookie.”


The website for the app has been taken down but the Bay Citizen was able to get a lot of the details:

The “about” tab for McClellan’s website details a vision for a new kind of social networking site:

My Nookie

Friends love to talk about sex and My Nookie is the app your sex life and social life can’t be without. Journal and rate your partners and sexual encounters. Share sexperiences with your closest friends, take sexting to the next level and relive your rendezvous with those five star partners.

Fun and tasteful with activity illustrations, My Nookie is fully loaded with features to flirt, play, tease and share. Feeling adventurous? Shake your phone and dare to try something new. Keep it handy on your iPhone because you never know …..

Features:

• Detailed diary of your sexual activities with date, partner, location, ratings and notes

• Partner contacts with profile, including photo, rating, activities performed, notes and tally

• Sex activity illustrations and descriptions, with the option to add your own

• ‘Shake It’ feature which suggests an activity to try

• Personal profile with ‘nookie’ summary

• Share all or some of your entries, partners, and profile

• Send a sexy invite to a partner or potential partner with alluring pictures

• Email, text or call your partners right from the app

What happens in My Nookie stays in My Nookie with optional pass code lock and discreet mode.

The Bay Citizen reports that My Nookie isn’t available in Apple’s app store (frankly, we’ll be surprised if passes Steve Jobs’s sniff test) but they have some screen shots (examples are on the following pages).

Unfortunately, now that Annabel has legal troubles to contend with, the Citizen reports her partner in the My Nookie venture, Milly Hanley, has taken over the project entirely. Arnie’s lawyer stated that he wasn’t involved with this venture while Annabel’s counsel simply stated that My Nookie was unrelated to their involvement and referred the Citizen back to Ms. Hanley who claims she can’t recall how she met Annabel.

The story around the McClellans is even weirder the more we poke around. Andrew Ross quotes a source in the San Francisco Chronicle:

“While they’ve been described as socialites, they’re definitely not at the top of that heap. I think a more apt description is they were attempting to scale the social heights.”

According to a report Wednesday in the online Bay Citizen, “in recent weeks, citing vague legal troubles, the couple had told friends that they were considering moving their family, which includes two school-aged sons, to South Africa.”

Perusing around a little bit more, Annabel’s Facebook page seems pretty locked up (definitely not accepting new friends) and we found the blog “My Nookie” which has the same feel as the mobile app and was started by “three friends in our 30s and 40s,” the third woman possibly being Jeanette Harris, who, the Citizen article states, hosted a benefit last year with the other two women.

From the blog’s “About Us” page:

We’re three friends in our 30s and 40s who realized that somewhere between meeting our husbands and getting married, we clammed up when it came to talking about our sex lives. MyNookie.com is where we can open up about everything we’re thinking about when it comes to sex and sexual health. And it’s where you can turn to for creative solutions and accurate information—because sex is too important to feel like you’re missing out.

Sure sounds like it could be our three amigas, doesn’t it? So with these developments, this story has gotten exponentially more interesting. We invite anyone with knowledge about the situation to email us and we’ll keep you updated as we learn more. Oh, and be sure to leave your thoughts on the app in the comments. Ms Hanley is probably looking for feedback.

(UPDATE) Area Man Searching for Accountant Addicted to Love

~ Update includes the spartan’s response to our request for comment.

No. Seriously.


Reportedly at LaSalle and Erie in Chicago. Yes, we’ve emailed Victor. No, we haven’t heard back.

Sayeth Vic:

Thank you for your help Caleb! Its just amazing how many people are pitching in to help find one person. Everyone except for the one person who left a comment on your site (even though it was kind of funny). If you hear anything on the interwebs about this girl let me know! I’m thinking there is a 50/50 chance she has seen this and is highly unimpressed. Oh well you have to try.

Unimpressed? Hardly dude. It’s fate (or something).

[via @retheauditors]

The Guy Responsible for Informing Us About Christine O’Donnell’s Pubic Hair Was an Auditor at the Federal Reserve

We’re just catching up to this little twist in the story so keep your pieholes shut. Plus, it’s election day, making it completely appropriate.

Hard to believe that it was just last Thursday when the anonymous first-hand account of a sexless one-night stand with Senate candidate Christine O’Donnell was published over Gawker, grooming details included.

Aside from Christine O’Donnell’s stance on masturbation, witchcraft and her inability to assign anyone to fill out a postcard for her nonprofit organization, we could have done without this particular exposé. An anonymous douche probably thought he would make off with Gawker’s ‘low four figure’ sum and he would be an anonymous anti-tea party hero.


The Smoking Gun immediately was on the case to identify the pube peeker in question and it really didn’t take much effort on their part, as they came to a pretty solid conclusion late on Thursday after speaking with the author’s former roommate, Brad Kursiko:

While Kurisko refused to out “Anonymous,” some online activity this evening may point to the author’s identity. Shortly after his last phone conversation with a TSG reporter, a single name disappeared from Kurisko’s list of Facebook friends.

The man with whom electronic ties were abruptly cut is Dustin Dominiak, a 28-year-old buddy who attended Albion College with Kurisko. Records show that Dominiak has previously shared a Philadelphia address with Kurisko. One online posting reports that Dominiak, a Michigan native, has worked as an auditor at the Federal Reserve in Philadelphia.

TSG finally got Kurisko to confirm Dominiak as the blathering broheim, thus providing him with the unenviable distinction of being “that guy who wrote about Christine O’Donnell’s pubes.” Especially if she manages to pull off the huge upset today.

But more interestingly this whole story has only reiterated our contention that the sex lives of accountants (and by extension, auditors) is completely random and scattered. This particular encounter – Senate candidates and their grooming habits; Philly Fed auditors that will do anything for a buck – might be the apex of the theory.

On The Trail Of “Anonymous,” Christine O’Donnell’s Sex-Free Pal [TSG via DI]

Local Man’s Brief Big 4 Experience, Stick-Shift Driving Abilities, Lead to Niche Accounting Firm

John Finn worked at KPMG in the early to mid-90s. He got into the field because he loved accounting. John discovered what many Big 4 types discover which is the job “involved more travel and schmoozing than it did accounting.” Since he wasn’t feeling it, he jumped ship in ’95, moved to New York and decided to get into showbiz. He landed his first gig doing the books for a film called Sleeping Together and since he could drive a standard transmission, he got to buzz around in the equiptment truck.

It turns out, that John’s marginal experience (three years) in Big 4 turned out to be way – WAY – more than most “accountants” in the movie business:

While he began his solo career with only three years of accounting experience under his belt — none of it in film accounting — inexperience turned out not to be an issue in the industry. “What I found out was that most of my peers were not trained as accountants,” he says. “They were failed screenwriters who really wanted to be in the business. I had a leg up on them because accounting was second nature to me. If you polled the accountants in the business, I would say that nearly half don’t have accounting degrees.”

Word must have gotten around about a real-life accountant doing the books for movie projects and in 1998, he founded JFA, Inc. to handle the expanding empire. That empire also includes IndiePay, a payroll software company that he founded to deal with the ‘archaic’ bookkeeping that was rampant in the industry.

On top of all this, John is in a band, Pispoure’, and wrote a song about how much he loves accounting. The song plays on a loop over at JFA’s website and before you assume that this another accountant failing miserably to exhibit any musical ability, it should be noted that he’s actually a decent songwriter. Anyone that comes up the lyric, “In order to get laid, you must impress our filing clerk,” is a natural talent in our book.

Leaving Big Accounting Firm for Hollywood [The Street.com]

A Friendly HR Reminder: The Workplace Is Not a Dating Service

Yes, your calendar is correct. Sir Caleb asked me to post on Whisky Wednesday. Fill up your glass, kick back in your chair, and let’s do this, shall we?

An area that I want to address is a topic that is otherwise whispered about or downright ignored by most engagement teams at accounting firms – dating in the workplace. For the purpose of this post, we’re going to let “dating” stand for anything from a one night stand to full fledge monogamous relationships. When done correctly and professionally, there is nothing wrong (from a legal or career perspective) with dating a co-worker. However – at least from my observations – the majority of cases do not fall under this description.

Sleepin’ your way to the top; shacking up with the enemy; earning an Encore award; shagging the secretary; deserving an early promo. Whatever you want to call it, getting drunk and hooking up with a coworker falls into a grey area. And by grey area, I mean the “what the hell were you thinking” area. I suggest treading lightly.


Why it happens – Birds and bees conversation aside, I’m talking about why so many accountants hook up with one another. On paper, it makes sense – similar backgrounds and interests, close and frequent exposure to one another, the lack of time to spend with others outside the office, and of course your campus recruiting department did a kick-ass job when “randomly” selecting resumés. Sure, your associate seems like a catch – but whom have you compared him/her to? Your manager? The mailroom staff? Security!? Come on. Your firm is not Match.com or the Casual Encounters section of Craigslist.

People talk – Newsflash of the day – your co-workers are a bunch of gossip mongers. Again, some of this is due to the “work is my life” mantra. Gossip flies around larger engagement teams when cliques are prevalent – do yourself a favor and head it off from the start of things – DON’T HOOK UP WITH SOMEONE FROM YOUR ENGAGEMENT TEAM. If you absolutely must “keep it in the accounting family,” try a different practice. (Didn’t you hear? Internal audit advisory services is saturated with hotties.) But really, avoid associating yourself with this kind of gossip. As time goes on and people get promoted and shuffled around, you never know who you’re going to be working with. Avoid the guaranteed awkwardness.

It can hurt your career – I’m not saying this is common, because it’s really not. It’s not ethical, but when it comes time for reviews, managers and partners are human. Non-work related factors – like sleeping your way around the block – can have an impact.

If you’re going to date someone from work…keep both of your careers in mind. Be honest with one another, and talk about things. A lot of factors can come into play – what practice lines you’re in, the possibility of working together, and long-term promotion paths are just a few. When marriage becomes a realistic possibility or you are unsure of how to proceed at any time, speak to someone in HR. They can help you better understand your firm’s HR policy and how it relates to your particular situation.

But for you horned up co-eds out there, listen up. Next time you’re out sipping the alcoholic Kool-aid at a partner sponsored “bonding event,” think twice before downing your drink remnants and hopping in a cab with the second year with the nice eyes. You’ll thank me the next morning when you don’t walk in wearing the same peach schnapps stained shirt you had on the night before.

Have a personal experience or bit of advice you want to share? Email me or comment below.

Quote of the Day: Auditors in Love | 02.10.10

“[If I Were An Auditor] tells the story of two auditors (would-be auditors) in love, who view their relationship through the lens of accounting and auditing.”

~ Edith Orenstein, editor of the FEI Financial Reporting Blog on the rom com created by her and many others in Second Life (just in time for St. Val’s).

Disappointing Accounting Firm Trend: Managers Sitting in Cubicles

Sorry for the downtime today, we’ll make it up to you over the weekend. Promise.

It’s no secret that staff professionals working in public accounting are urged to “stay until manager” for all kinds of substantive reasons that we won’t get into here.

The attraction of being promoted to manager has many superficial benefits including being called a “manager”, having “manager” on your business cards, and getting an office rather than slumming in the cube farm.


With the reconfiguration of some offices however, your dream of getting an office with a door and possibly a window may be dashed as more and more managers, senior managers, and — GASP — even some directors are living life in the grey squares.

Now while this development is most certainly a direct slap in the face of everything public accounting represents, our understanding is that it is not spreading around like H1N1. It depends on the city you’re in, your practice, and possibly your coolness factor.

But if you are in one of the unlucky few in could be much, much worse if more firms follow the lead of E&Y Jericho and go the no-décor-will-be-allowed route (God help you if they lock the bathrooms too). How will these managers be able to appropriately express themselves? Oh! And how on Earth is a manager supposed to get some action during busy season? Cubicle sex is not happening. Christ, how will they live?

Obvious Sign of Fraud: You’re Having Sex with the Client

distraction.jpgIn case you young auditors thought you needed to have highly acute senses to detect fraud at your clients, you’re dead wrong.
Best thing you can do is immediately become skeptical if you find yourself trying to figure out the best posish for the client’s office supply room:
More, after the jump

“These auditors from the Big Four accounting firms are usually single kids just a few years out of school. What do kids in their 20s think about all the time? Sex,” said [Sam] Antar, who was at the center of a multi-million dollar fraud 20 years ago.
So Antar would pair “cute hot female” employees with male auditors as part of his distraction strategy. “In effect, I was a fraudster, matchmaker and pimp,” said Antar, who avoided jail time by working with the U.S. government, and now advises government agencies and businesses on avoiding accounting fraud.

As we’ve covered, the opportunities for accountants to get some action can be few and far between so this strategy makes perfect sense.
This will put many of you in a very difficult situation. We really wish the best for all you of in the getting laid department especially when it involves someone that would ordinarily be way out of your league.
But you may have to decide: Do you uncover the next diabolical Ponzi scheme or do you totally cave to the irresistible charms of the guy that looks way too much like Chace Crawford?
Who would it take for you to overlook a few million in misappropriated funds? Discuss in the comments.
Financial fraud — accounting for criminals [CNN]

Trying to Decipher the Awkward and Scattered Sex Lives of Accountants

The blog Energized Accounting asks if accountants make better lovers. Now before you all squawking about how you’re an animal in the sack, let’s try to be realistic about this question.

First of all, this makes the assumption that accountants are getting laid in the first place. This is mostly farcical for a couple reasons: A) Lots of accountants have to choose between sleeping and eating already because of the hours they work. You throw in boot-knocking and some excel wizards are going to start starving to death; and 2) Unofficial statistics have shown that seven out ten accountants have no game. You may not know who you are but your friends do.

So based on that, 30% of you are getting some action. And since there is a rampant proclivity to date co-workers (which we will exclude for this exercise) among accountants that narrows it down to about 5% of accountants having sex with non-bean counters. As we mentioned, you’re working most of the time so where the hell is this hot sex happening? We’re thinking that national training sessions might be one spot, where you’re picking up prosties or random hot townies in whatever strange city you happen to land in? Accountants treat national training like Vegas so pretty much anything goes but what about the other 51 weeks in the year? Is that what is going on at those two hour lunches? Do some client locations have rooms set up for this like a swing-joint? Try to enlighten us without making a scene.