September 26, 2022

Protip to Government Accountants: If You’re Into Kiddie Porn, You Probably Shouldn’t Watch It At Work

Lord knows I'm no prude but I think we can all agree there is never an appropriate time or place for kiddie porn. That being said, if there were a good time and place (again, there isn't), it definitely isn't at work:

Denver's Public Works Department fired a senior accountant accused of viewing child pornography at work, but there is no indication the matter was ever referred to law enforcement.

After a co-worker alleged she saw him viewing "pornography involving pre-pubescent girls," the city reviewed the Internet usage of the accountant, Stephen Zelarney, conducted on his work computer in the Wellington E. Webb Municipal Office Building during the morning of March 15, 2013.

That report found the sites he visited included: "stories of rape 14 times, prisoner rape, survivor stories viewed 20 times, teenage rape viewed 22 times, pictures of 12-year-old girls viewed six times (and) teenage rape stories viewed 16 times."

Kiddie porn AND rape porn? ON THE JOB? How sick do you have to be to think that is at all OK? I can almost (seriously, almost, as in "not quite") understand indulging in rape porn featuring adults from the privacy of your own home but AT WORK?! Sorry, allegedly at work.

BUT WAIT. It was research. Research, you guys.

Zelarney, 57, in an interview with The Denver Post, confirmed that his superiors never alerted law enforcement authorities of his Internet viewing, but he denied that he was looking at pornography at work.

"I guess it depends on how you define that," Zelarney said, adding that he did not contest the allegations because he was old enough to retire and receive a pension and did not want a lengthy legal fight.

As to whether he was viewing pornography of "prepubescent girls," Zelarney said his superiors mistakenly confused the sites he was researching in his effort to help his girlfriend’s daughter audition in the Miss Colorado Pageant.

According to the Denver Post, the colleague who turned him into his superiors said his Internet use was adversely impacting his ability to perform his job. Yikes.

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