Footnotes: How to Get the Cheapest Uber Fare Tonight; Dudes Aren’t Doing Well For Themselves; Drunk in DC | 12.31.13

Ed. note: as we're taking tomorrow off (duh) but will be back Thursday barring any wild incidents such as me falling off my rooftop deck or into the James River, you all are fully allowed to use this final Footnotes of 2013 as a New Year's Open Items should you have grievances to air that can't wait until Friday. You are also allowed to drunk tweet me later xoxo

FUCK YEAH WALL STREET, those capital markets you all work your tails off to protect had the best year since I was just learning how to be an Internet troll in an AOL chatroom [Reuters]

On the other hand, gold had the worst year since I was still crapping in a diaper [Telegraph]

No matter how depressing the thought of another year doing whatever the hell it is you do might make you feel, don't let it drive you to law school! [Above the Law]

Over 40 years, dudes are making a lot less money [The Market Now via Bloomberg]

How to keep your wallet from getting bent over by Uber tonight [The Atlantic]

Deloitte Digital presents: Awesome Sauce! Whose ass do we have to kiss to get some of that? [The Dieline]

Gawker has 61 things 2013 was the "year of" but totally forgot to include hashtag-littered farewell email on their list [Gawker]

For my fellow Washingtonians, WMATA released a video of drunk people falling in Metro stations to remind us all not to ride Metro if we are too hammered. It is accidentally the funniest thing I have seen all day (assuming everyone is OK, of course) [Washingtonian/YouTube]

Be safe and see you next year!

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