Per Criminal, PwC is Preferred Audit Firm for Criminals

Caleb likes to turn to me for all matters female-related (pay, the work-life lie, etc), so he asked if I would skip my CPA exam column today – since none of you sent me any questions to answer anyway – and give my opinion on the stupid PwC Ireland dbags who spread around pics of hotties.

“Sure,” I said, sharpening my claws.

First, have we NOT told you people over and over again DON’T USE WORK EMAIL FOR DEBAUCHERY AND GENERAL ASSHATTERY?! Speaking only for myself, I have specifically written here and on JDA at least a bazillion or more times warning of the dangers of sloppy conduct in a manner completely traceable by management, colleagues and clients.

What is it going to take to get this through your heads? I remind all of you that after Enron blew up every single email was made public by the Justice Department (and if you’re bored, you can search through said emails here but I warn you, some are gross and graphic even to me) so don’t think what you do on the company PP&E is limited to whomever you copy on your piggish emails.

And remember, with snitches everywhere, everyone has our email address and as obviously demonstrated by this whole PwC hottie email being sent to us first, chances are if you’re acting like an ass we’re going to find out and embarrass you. Call it our way of continuing to protect the public interest even though Caleb is retired from the profession and I am but an enthusiastic outsider without a CPA.

Second, I really don’t care if pigs decide to rank women in their office by hotness but if you’re going to do it, man up and attach cockshots so the girls can do their own ranking. You know, in the interest of fairness. If you’re not willing to apply the same sick standard to your own goods while contemplating the goods of your coworkers, leave the immature ranking to the bar and not extensive email chains. Seriously. If any of the PwC Hottie perps care to redeem themselves, cockshots may be addressed directly to me here. If I don’t receive any, I’ll assume that’s because you all are a bunch of shrunken cowards who aren’t getting any anyway.

Last but not least, don’t you guys have anything better to do? Seriously. This level of creepiness is just one level above stalking, frankly, and it is both disturbing and hilarious that these three PwC Ireland associates have absolutely nothing better to do than play Hot or Not on company time using company email. Can’t you just watch porn like SEC employees or play constant solitaire like normal folk wasting company time?

Sick. Entertaining and not all that offensive, just sick. I cannot speak for the rest of the female race and only for myself but I’m pretty sure many of them would also feel these idiots can possibly redeem themselves with cockshots. Commence to repentance, losers.