Auditing the Fed? Good Luck with That

in_greed_we_trust.jpgEditor’s Note: Want more JDA? You can see all of her posts for GC here, her blog here and stalk her on Twitter.

I have often been accused of taking the term “audit” in “Audit the Fed” a tad too literally. Thinking as an auditor might stem from spending far too many hours in Audit class (I’m not a CPA, I just play one on teevee). Nevertheless, I cannot help but wonder what proponents of a Fed audit think they’ll find once they crack open the books.


My primary concern is that Fed accountants do not use GAAP but rather a bizarre hybrid of GAAP, governmental, and WTF accounting. In fact, they write their own 325 page manual on accounting for Federal Reserve Banks and if you’re really really bored you can find that document here. What auditor is qualified to audit those statements? In no other situation would the client hand you their accounting manual and say, “Do us a favor and make sure we prepared our statements in accordance with our own special rules, would you? Thanks!” except in this case. And maybe that’s where I’m hung up on the word “audit.”

Some have argued that the “audit” in “Audit the Fed” actually means “crack open the books and figure out where the bailout bodies are buried.” Okay, that’s all well and good but even if that’s the case, how would an independent, outside source identify these bodies? It goes back to the client-provided handbook and we’re back at square one: defining the Fed balance sheet as a freak of nature.

It’s right there in the footnotes – pulling out the closest Fed annual report I’ve got (Richmond Fed 2007), both Deloitte and PwC agree that the Fed is a special case in Note 3: Significant Accounting Policies:

Accounting principles for entities with unique powers and responsibilities of the nation’s central bank have not been formulated by accounting standard-setting bodies.

The note goes on to explain why government securities held by the Fed are presented at amortized cost instead of GAAP’s fair value presentation because “amortized cost more appropriately reflects the Bank’s securities holdings given the System’s unique responsibility to conduct monetary policy.” Right there, you can see why auditing this thing might be a problem.

Proponents of HR 1207 and now newer proposed legislation to storm the Fed’s financials say that we need transparency from our central bank but I have argued time and time again that we’ll never get there poking around their statements trying to find the bloody glove. We’re
going to have to do better than an audit. Hell, Citigroup can pass an audit.

For more on Fed audits from yours truly, check out Fed Economic Rocket Scientists on Auditing the Fed, Liquidity Crises, They’re Comin for Dat Ass, Bernanke: Defining “Federal Reserve Accountability”, Auditing the Fed: Redux, and You Want to Audit the Fed. But Why?

Today in Bad Decisions: Borrowing Money from Your Ex-Mother-in-Law

mother-in-law.jpgDo you have a mother-in-law? How well do you get along with her? Not good, huh? Whatever differences you may have, surely it’s not this bad:

When a former son-in-law in Illinois failed to settle an asserted loan by his ex-mother-in-law to her satisfaction, she gave up on collecting but issued a 1099-C reporting the amount as debt forgiveness income.
Ex-Son-in-Law took it badly, and fought back. He sued Ex-Mom, claiming that because she wasn’t required to issue a 1099-C, it was fraudulent for her to do so.

Borrowing money from your mother-in-law, let alone your ex-mother-in-law is not what we would consider a good life decision. Jesus, especially if you’re a deadbeat. We understand that times are tough but hey, next time around he’ll know.
So this guy is in a tough spot. Solution? Sue her for fraud, of course! The judge in the case said someone issuing an unnecessary 1099 did not constitute fraud so the son’s only remedy now is to argue that the contents of said 1099 were fraudulent. Good luck with that, man. You’re finished.
A Victory For Bitter Ex-Mother-In-Laws Everywhere [Tax Update Blog]

Job of the Week: S&P Needs Help Getting Things Back on Track

hire me2.jpgOr at least give it your best shot. Rating agencies have received their fair share of the blame for the mess we’re in so some fresh blood is in order.
S&P needs an Associate Director – Financial Planning and Analysis. You.


Company: Standard & Poor’s
Location: New York
Title: Associate Director – Financial Planning and Analysis
Description: The Associate Director – Financial Planning & Analysis is responsible for providing financial analysis and support to the Standard & Poor’s Structured Finance Ratings team. The position provides financial support to the Director, Finance and VP, Finance in the US including the preparation of budget and medium range plans for individual cost centers.
Responsibilities: Identify, track, and disseminate information on environment and industry trends; Perform special in-depth analysis on an ad hoc basis; Report and track Global Insurance trends and produce forward issuance estimates in conjunction with BLs/RPLs; Direct the centralized planning function for Structured Finance Ratings, ranging from more conceptual to the more task-oriented; Prepare internal and external presentations; Develop central components of monthly management reports; Advise line operations and development personnel in the identification, research, evaluation and presentation of specific recommendations to senior management on new products and business opportunities; Provide timely flow of the full range of strategic and environmental planning information and analysis
Skills Required: An MBA with a concentration in Finance or a CPA, as well as a minimum of 4-7 years experience in business planning and development functions and/or management consulting; Highly developed research and analytical skills
See the full description at the GC Career Center and check out all the other great jobs at the main page.

CalCPA Is Doing About Everything It Can to Motivate You to Reactivate Your CPA

the-big-lebowski-bridges-dude.jpgThe California Society of CPAs understands that some of you are lazy. You don’t work for a company that provides enough CPE (and the cheapskates won’t send you to Vegas for a week) and self-study is out of the question, so your license becomes inactive.
So CalCPA is trying to get you back on the fast track to active status by offering the CPA Active Pass.
This will allow you to get the “inactive” from behind those precious letters and you can wear all of your CPA attire again without having to explain that you’re technically not an active CPA. Details-shmetails.
The CPA Active Pass allows you attend 80 hours of live CPE courses including webcasts, which is the real bonus so you won’t even have to leave your house.
No more excuses people.
CalCPA Helps Inactive California CPAs Reactivate [Web CPA]
Earlier: Arnie Signs 150-Hour Rule for California

Preliminary Analytics | 10.23.09

Ben_Bernanke.jpgBernanke Calls for Action on Reform – Ben is kindly reminding everyone that maybe we should try to make some regulatory changes since, you know, the world almost ended. [WSJ]
The pyramid principle – Small banks are not doing so hot. [The Economist]
Critics: Executive Pay Cuts A Sop To Taxpayers – Campaigns are starting people, progress will have to wait. [NPR]
Man Pleads Guilty To DWI In Motorized La-Z-Boy – Doing anything with a BAC of 0.29 is probably illegal. [AP via NPR]
Bank claim that is out of this world – Dalton Chisholm has to present additional evidence today in order to give him a prayer at becoming the first ever billion-trillionaire. [BBC]

Review Comments | 10.22.09

bday.jpgThe Code is 23! – Happy, happy. [Tax Update Blog]
Accounting Firms Succeed Despite Economic Slump – “CCH, a Wolters Kluwer business, surveyed 100 U.S. accounting firms and found that even in a contracted economy, none of the firms have lowered their rates.” [Web CPA]
Microsoft Tries to Lose ‘PC Guy’ Image With Windows 7 – Hodgman. We warned you. [Bloomberg]
Is $5,500 Golf Cart Credit Emblematic of “Tax Policy in the Age of Obama”WSJ op-ed criticizing the President’s policy? The horror. [TaxProf Blog]
Fraud Reported in Program to Help New Homebuyers – “Some claims were filed for children as young as 4 years old.” [NYT]

SHOCKER: Volunteer Tax Preparers Have High Error Rates

Forty-one percent per a Treasury Inspector General for Tax Administration report. Luckily, the TIGTA has suggestions:

TIGTA recommended that the IRS analyze the accuracy of returns prepared at individual volunteer sites to identify patterns and concerns on which to focus education, training and accountability. The report also suggested that the IRS improve the intake sheet that is used at the start of the tax prep process to include questions based on new tax laws and filing status, and improve the reviews of intake sheets and returns completed at volunteer sites.

The TIGTA anonymously sent auditors to volunteer testing sites which seems pretty unfair. If those sneaky bastards had reviewed the tax returns instead of Monday morning quarterbacking the volunteers maybe there would’ve been less mistakes. Just a thought.

Volunteer Tax Preparers Have High Error Rates [Web CPA]

The SEC’s Education of the Public Now Includes Video Games

Thumbnail image for Mary Schapiro.jpgJust when you thought the SEC had run out of good ideas, investor.gov comes along and just blows your mind all over again.
Nevermind Mary Schapiro’s surprisingly pleasant welcome and tips on how to avoid fraud. The Money Game page is where the real ingenuity comes into play.
Moneytopia takes a while to load, which obviously serves as proof that this latest method of educating the public has caught fire like no one could have expected.
Except for the Commission that is. Lucky for us, Schape & Co. had the foresight to realize how popular Moneytopia would be and allows you to play Bust Out while you wait.
When the game finally loads (after our horrendous score of 600), Moneytopia takes a stab at our earlier suggestion regarding financial statements, using cartoons and make believe wealth and connections to explain how to be not only a better investor but an honest investor. Like we said, another bullseye.

We’d All Appreciate It if Grant Thornton Got Involved in a New Lawsuit

bondi_enrico01g.jpgGrant Thornton just isn’t able to shake Parmalat, the freaky-ass extended-life milk company. Parmalat appealed the latest dismissal of its lawsuit against GT and Bank of America that accuses the two companies of helping set up phony transactions so “insiders could steal from the company.”
Parmalat’s Chief Milk-Magician, Enrico Bondi, is obviously not satisfied with the $100 million that he twisted away from BofA and will continue to hassling both companies until long past the expiration date on his product.
Parmalat appeals BofA, auditor lawsuit dismissals [Reuters]

Employee Satisfaction Survey: GC Edition

In the spirit of what appears to be survey week, we’re honoring requests to do our own survey. Plus we’ve been inspired by some questions that we’ve seen in the comments.
We’ve presented a few questions for you to answer, after the jump. Feel free to add your more appropriate “D” answer to any of them. We also encourage you to keep submitting your questions with multiple choice responses.


Question 1 – I feel that I am recognized for my performance:
A. Too frequently by ass-grabs.
B. Not frequently enough by ass-grabs.
C. I prefer to not be recognized for my performance because I don’t like anyone talking to me and if I have one more conversation with one of these idiots I’m punching that idiot in the face.
Question 2 – Leadership’s communication:
A. Is jamming up my inbox to the point that I can’t locate my porn newsletters.
B. Is helpful when I’m having trouble vomiting.
C. Would be much more tolerable if it was a show tune sung by Hugh Jackman.
Question 3 – I feel that my compensation:
A. Is about as fair as getting kicked in the genitals on a daily basis.
B. Is appropriate if I had not finished high school.
C. Makes my friend, who delivers newspapers, laugh.

Grant Thornton Survey: Financial Statements Are Still Too Complex for the Average Shmo Investor

dumb-and-dumber3.jpgThat’s right! Way too complicated. GT’s survey states that 73% of the finance bigwigs surveyed believe financial statements are too complex for the average investor to understand. That’s bad because even more respondents (82%) said that financial statements should “be prepared to meet the needs of the average investor”.
Strangely, this survey’s respondents, “CFOs and senior comptrollers”, are directly responsible for the still-too-confusing financial statements. Unless, of course, everyone that responded to this survey already has easy-to-understand financials and thus, is thinking, “NMFP”.
Also, average investor is not explicitly defined which doesn’t help us put the survey in context. So we’ll put it out there that if “average investor” is anything remotely similar to the “average American”, the solution to this whole problem may be to get Fisher-Price and reality TV producers involved.
Nearly three-quarters of senior financial executives say financial statements too complex for investors [Press Release]