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PwC Employee Gives Himself Mixed Reviews on Making Legendary Carpenter Look Good During Tenure at the Firm

Posted on July 13, 2012 by Caleb Newquist

What makes for a good PwC employee? Excel skills? Critical thinking? The number of high-fives given to co-workers when they manage to not screw something up? Every one measures him or herself differently even though your superiors often measure you by indecipherable arbitrary platitudes.

But in a farewell email that several sources have sent to us, we learn that one soon-to-be ex-employee admits that he has fallen short of his own expectations: 

Hi Everybody, 
 
Today is my last day with the Firm. I just wanted to thank everyone for everything. I learned a lot about myself and I am grateful for the friends I made. 
 
I remembered when I was in an interview years ago for my internship, I told my interviewers what defined me first and foremost as a person is Jesus, my family then friends. Today, I would say that Jesus still defines who I am as a person because I believe He is good and He loves us so much that He died on the cross so that we can come back to Him (John 3:16). I know that I had many opportunities to make Jesus look good during my time in the Firm and many times, I failed to do so because I was timid and did not love people as I should. However, I believe everyday is a new day of grace and there is another opportunity to make Jesus look good. I’ll leave you with one of my favorite Bible quotes: Then Jesus said, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest." Matthew 11:28 
 
My personal email is [redacted]. Feel free to contact me if you ever wanted to talk about Jesus. 
 
Thank You! 
This strikes me as a sincere email and I mean, seriously, who wouldn't want to be down with JC? You know how it is when the party is going strong and all of a sudden the food and booze is running low. With the SoG around, those problems can be fixed with some water, a few loaves of Wonder Bread, and a box of fish sticks. So anyone that could use a little more of that (or maybe some of that salvation stuff) should jump at this opportunity.
 
But as for this guy's performance (i.e. making Jesus look good), I think this guy is being a little too hard on himself. JC was betrayed, doubted, and denied by his closest friends. You're an auditor. He's already forgiven you just for that.
Posted in Big 4, PwCTagged Auditors, carpenters, Farewell emails, Jesus, Performance, PwC, What? No Ezekiel 25:17 in the farewell email?

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Previous: Bill Clinton Is Stumped By Mitt Romney’s Tax Returns (or Lack Thereof)
Next: Footnotes: Your Baby’s Stupid Name and Other Regrettable Choices | 07.13.12

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On Monday we learned that Deloitte Tax had a STD and now there’s more chatter about the firm’s performance that could maybe, possibly affect comp for this year:

A new set of video blogs came out from the northeast regional managing partner. He announced double digit growth in perdiods [sic] 9-13 of FY10 and a plan for “continued double digit growth through FY11”. I know everyone is getting antsy over compensation (discussions are supposed to take place beginning next week, with raises hitting on the 9/3/10 payroll), and they keep dropping comments about “substantial raises” and “double digit growth.”


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For a firm that talks like they’ll be numero uno in a few short years, it would be pretty embarrassing to bring in some paltry raises while the firm they’re chasing managed to make it up to at least a few of their people. Discuss the latest and keep us informed.

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Does This Mean We Aren’t Going to Find Out Who’s Sleeping Their Way to Partner?

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Dammit people, what’s with the amateurs? If you’re going to superficially judge your co-workers, wouldn’t common sense tell you to not to use a work email address?

Holly Leam-Taylor became the latest victim of a viral email craze when her light hearted message to colleagues spread like wildfire across the internet.

In the email, entitled Deloitte First year analysts Christmas Awards, sent on December 8, Ms Leam-Taylor asked her female colleagues to vote on which men in the office they considered most attractive.


A terribly disappointing turn of events, since it was all in good fun:

Miss Leam-Taylor, who studied at Warwick University before landing a place on the prestigious Deloitte graduate trainee scheme, said: “Obviously I never imagined the email would reach this level of awareness. Most people have recognised that what I wrote was in good spirit, but in retrospect I realise it probably wasn’t the best idea.
“It was my choice to resign and I will not be providing any further comment.”
Speaking at the family home in Staines, Middlesex, her father Andrew said: “She is very fed up about the whole thing.”

She’s fed up? What about the rest of us? We were expecting RESULTS.

Pictures, STD reports, the works. Now what the hell are we supposed to do? Is anyone willing to pick this up where poor Holly left off? If you do pick up the torch for crissakes, use a personal email address.

We cannot express our devastation further.

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