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Wanted: North Dakota Tax Professionals Who Don’t Mind Stilettos And G-Strings

A tipster clues us in to the wild world of one small oil boomtown in North Dakota that’s going to need some pretty open-minded tax pros in town if things keep up:

CNNMoney:

Forget Vegas. Strippers are discovering they can make ten times as much dancing in the oil boomtown of Williston, N.D.

Thousands of men have come here seeking high-paying jobs working for the oil companies. And, at the end of the day (or four or five days when they’re working on a rig), many of them are looking for some female companionship at one of the town’s two strip club’s [sic], Whispers or Heartbreakers.

Word has gotten out about just how much money can be made dancing in Williston’s strip clubs. The money is phenomenal, but the competition is stiff.

Whispers has received applications from exotic dancers in Hawaii, Alaska, even the Czech Republic and Germany, said Melissa Slapnicka, the co-owner of the club. She’s been bombarded with so many applications that she only gives each dancer a week to try out. If they don’t work out, they don’t come back, she said.

According to the article, one 36-year-old stripper (uhh…) who has traveled to Williston for dancing work over the last few years now finds herself making $2000 – $3000 in a single night. I don’t expect you guys to know this but that’s a lot of money for a stripper to make in a single evening.

Even on a slow night, Slapnicka says her girls are bringing home $1500.

Assuming her girls are 1099 employees, looks like there might be an opening for a qualified tax professional willing to help these successful strippers ensure their tax house is in order. Especially now that they’ve been featured in a major media outlet, you can rest assured the Shulman Army has been dispatched to keep an eye on their gains.

Paging The Tax Domme!

You’re Wasting Your Time if You Attempt to Bribe an IRS Agent with Starbucks

As we’ve recently learned, IRS Agents are a zealous bunch. If you’re out of compliance you can bet the life of your labrador that they will run you down for the overdue tax, regardless of the sum.

Now perhaps you’ve been thinking that a little bribery might take care of things if you find yourself in a bit tax trouble. IRS Agents are human(?) after all; they fall ill to the temptations of this world just like the rest of us. And because they most likely have some sort of accounting background, they are most certainly caffeine abusers and thus, Starbucks whores.


But an Agent’s first responsibility is to serve the American Taxpayer and your attempts to tempt these civil servants with sweet, venti-sized, mega-calorie caffeinated beverages WILL NOT WORK:

Kim Oahn Thi Tran, also known as Jennifer Kim Tran, faced a tax liability of more than $13,287 for the 2006 and 2007 tax years on unreported income of $30,334, authorities said.

In hopes of lowering her tax liability, Tran sent a package on Nov. 30 to IRS revenue agent Imad Hararah that contained promissory notes and a $100 gift card for Starbucks Coffee that read, “To Imad: Enjoy,” investigators said.

Agent Hararah did not fall for this ploy. Nor did he accept the $2,000 that Tran attempted to give him. Instead this presented itself as a perfect opportunity to add charges, “On Dec. 9, Tran gave the agent $1,500, authorities said. In exchange, Hararah gave her a phony document that made Tran believe that she had a zero balance for 2006 and 2007 tax years.”

Does this guy love his job or what? Not cold hard cash nor natural stimulant will distract this man from doing his job. We can only assume that his brethren are of the same cloth and soon we’ll hear about Agents turning down dates with Lane Kiffin.

Woman charged with trying to bribe IRS agent [SF Chronicle]