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Comp Watch ’11: Someone at Ernst & Young Wasn’t Too Discreet with Sensitive Info on Their Commute

From the mailbag:

Happened to be sitting behind someone on my NYC commute this week who was reading a deck (in font large enough for me to read) on EY’s salary ranges etc. Didn’t see any $ numbers and most was hard to see without context or the full page but I did see this:

(I don’t know ey terms – apr = annual performance rating?)

APR 3 4 5
S. Mgr 1% 2% 3%
Mgr 2% 3% 4%

Our tipster stated that the percentages were supposed to represent “minimum raise.” Hard what to make of this as rumors have been all over the board from “They told us not to have very high expectations,” to ” Per my discussions with an Office Managing Partner and a National Practice Leader …. raises should be close to (if not the same) as prior year.” But considering there’s an expensive legal battle on the horizon, maybe this isn’t so crazy? Discuss.

Problem of the Day: Non-smoking, Cheapskate, Immature Newbie Is Cramping My Commute

Since everyone’s distracted by brackets and projectile vomiting in the street, I thought I’d pull another “problem” from our Twisted British Sister site:

So a new ‘man’ (18) started last week and I got chatting to him in the car park as he was loitering waiting for the office to open. It turns out he lives vaguely near me and I, in passing, said that if he was ever stuck trying to get to work (e.g. from rain, hail, wind or snow) he should let me know and I could always swing by and fetch him.

I know – an 18 year-old co-worker? Just go with it:

On Monday he asked if I could bring him to work. Being soft I said ok and gave him a lift. Then home. Then Tuesday to work and back. Yesterday he got in and said ‘Oh, I’ve been thinking, I should pay you for these lifts’. Resigned to my fate as being soft and letting him keep getting lifts I consoled myself thinking ‘Oh well, my petrol is £45 a week, at least he will cut my commuting costs’. I gave him a lift home and he said ‘Is this alright for a weeks worth?’ and gave me a pile of shrapnel. I counted it when I got home and it was £7.91.

I can’t smoke with him in the car as he coughs. I don’t like to have music on as I feel obliged to force conversation. He is 18 and therefore annoying to talk to.

I want him out of my car, but he is nice and I am nice, so how do I do it? If I pushed him out on the dual carriage way would the police take a dim view?

Nothing WORSE than a non-smoker and a cheapskate, amiright? Suggestions for this chap are now welcome (if you’re still sober enough to type, that is).